I was 13 years old that time when I became curious about RPW so I made one.
At first, I didn't know their rules pero habang tumatagal ay nalalaman ko at habang tumatagal din ako sa RPW ay may naging nobyo ako but I didn't take it seriously kasi ika nga nila we're just here in RPW so basically it's all fake and there's a rule na silver rule.
Not until I met this guy named Mateo. He's a famous r'pier. He caught my attention so I decided to flirt with him.
At first, he was really a snob ni ayaw nga akong pansinin pero habang tumatagal ay naging kaibigan ko na din ito dahil sa palagi kong pagpapansin sa kaniya kahit sa comsec niya.
Noong una, gusto ko sundin lahat ng rule but when I met him I broke the RPW rule. I sent him my OP, my real account, and even fell in love with him.
"Mateo, I know that we just know each other here on social media. I know I'm breaking the rule but I can't stop myself from falling in love with you" I confessed through message.
Dahil doon ay bumalik kami sa dati, dati na hindi niya ako pinapansin balik din sa pagiging snob nito at cold.
Unti-unti ko na rin naman itong natatanggap na wala na talaga kaming pag-asa. Not until I became 18 years old.
There's a message pop up on my screen, so I checked it. I'm shocked when I see who was is to the point that my jaw dropped because of this sudden message.
I click it. "It's been a years since the last time we talked, now you're 18 I could court you now," napatanga na lang ako sa message nito.
Kahit nanginginig ang kamay ko ay nagtype ako nang maire-reply dito. "What are you saying? Ikaw na mismo ang umiwas sa akin at tapos na 'yun" I send ko dito.
"I just did that because you are too young for me that time just why I avoided you, but believe me it's hard for me to do it" reply nito sa akin at dahil dakila akong marupok at alam ko pa sa sarili ko na mahal ko pa siya ay pumayag ako.
Tatlong buwan itong nanligaw sa akin na kalaunan ay sinagot ko na. I even planning to change our status into in a relationship but he refused. He didn't want them to know yet so I agreed.
Kahit pumayag ako ay there's still a part of me na nasasaktan. As a girl, I want them to know that I own Mateo and he owns me. Gusto ko ipagsigawan na kami pero he can't do the same thing to me even though he gives me the assurance.
"I'm sorry, Annika. But I'm still not yet ready to tell it to everyone. I hope you understand me, babe" that's what he always told me.
Akala ko kapag nag one year na kami ay okay na at ipapakilala niya na ako pero hindi pa rin pala. Tatlong araw din itong hindi nag-online kaya I decided to open his account.
Habang tinitignan ko ang profile at timeline nito ay hindi ko maiwasang hindi manliit. He's a famous r'pier while I'm just nobody.
Akmang titignan ko pa ang isang mga post nito when a group chat caught my attention so I pressed it.
At bumulaga sa akin ang ingay nito. Ito 'yung group chat nilang magkakaibigan kaya tinignan ko ang mga member nito. Hindi ko maiwasang madismaya dahil ang girlfriend ng mga kaibigan niya ay nandito habang ako ay hindi.
Masyado na ba akong OA na kahit 'yun ay nasasaktan ako sa maliit na bagay.
Agad akong nabalik sa realidad ng mag-chat ang isa niya pang kaibigan na siyang ikinalamig ko.
"Pre, kamusta naman ang date niyo ni Beverly? Girlfriend mo na ba?"
Who's Beverly? I ask myself even when I know that I can't answer my own question. Para akong binuhusan ng malamig na tubig. Dahil sa chat ng kaibigan niya ay agad kung hinanap ang RA nito.
Mas lalo lang akong nadismaya habang nakita ang post nitong naka-akbay sa babae at masayang nakangiti sa camera.
I don't know what should I feel. I feel like I'm numb right now. While I'm asking my worth he is doing something behind my back.
Dahil sa nasaksihan ay one week din akong hindi nag-online. Akala ko ma-mi-miss niya ako or even explain his side but I'm wrong. Tanging "good morning" lang ang naging chat nito at wala na.
Hindi ko mapigilang umiyak. "Did he even really love me?"
Kinabukasan ay ganun parin ang cold niya nang mag-reply. Ramdam ko 'yung pinipilit niya lang mag-reply pero walang ka-interesado.
Nagtiis parin ako kahit ganun dahil mahal ko siya not until nakita ko ang kaniyang post sa NF ko. He's status.
From single to in a relationship with this girl na hindi familiar sa akin. When I stalked her ay wala akong nakita halatang bago pa lang gawa ang account. Pero ang mas nakapukaw sa akin ay ang comsec niya at ang tawag niya sa babae.
"I love you so much, Beverly. I can't imagine my life without you beside me, love" ani nito na inulan ng heart react.
Halos madurog ako pero I still managed to chat him, to confront him.
"Why?"
"I'm sorry for not telling you this but I fell out of love with you. Besides, you can find a man naman na nasa tabi mo eh hindi ako sanay pala sa LDR" tanging reply nito.
Pagak lang akong natawa. "Ni minsan minahal mo man lang ba ako?
"I loved you pero hindi ito kalalim gaya ng inaasahan mo" mas lalo akong naasar dahil dito. He's the one who insisted to court me.
"Ang kapal ng mukha mo. Kung hindi ka na lang bumalik sa buhay ko edi maayos sana now I know kung ano talaga ang tunay mong ugali you're nothing but a trash" hindi ko na maiwasang i-chat ito sa kaniya.
Pero mas nagulantang ako sa naging reply nito sa akin. "We're here in the RPW but do you expect me to love you? Come on, we're in a fake world so if you fell in love, that's your loss, not mine" hindi ko na mapigilang umiyak.
"Be happy with her, don't hurt her like what you did to me. Love her" that's my last message to him before I leave and forget RPW.
