Slash

The Eyes of A Beast

It was quite a cold spring for Hollowrest, the leaves were still straining to hang onto each branch, the dead grass littered with its fallen comrades. There wasn't a blossoming flower in sight still. I lean back against the large cold boulder, notebook in hand as I squint at the last leaf hanging onto its lonely branch. I'm almost done with my sketch....just need a few more little details. I don't know why I waste my time with such stupid nonsense. There is no use for silly doodles on the path I'm on. I let out a defeated sigh, staring down at the lone leaf barely staying attached to that bare branch. The last leaf on the tree. It's quite a trooper, really, all of its fallen friends and family, yet it's still hanging on with all of its strength. I feel you, leaf, I feel you.
Just as I think that, I watch in disappointment as it finally loses its death grip, slowly, gracefully, falling down to its death. I'm disappointed in you, leaf. I thought maybe we might had been kindred spirits. That was a foolish thought anyways, not even a leaf could be like me. No human, nor no animal, will ever be like me. For I truly am just a monster.
I run my slender fingers through my choppy black hair, it was quite wavy, like a dark black ocean on a still night, the waves ever so slightly washing up onto the shore. I quickly let go of my hair, putting back behind my ears out of sight. I would had thought that over the years, I would had grown to accept what I am...but...that's a little difficult when everyone in town looks at you like your made of slime. All because of the way I look. Different. Something they haven't seen before, so it's naturally just labeled as strange. My face isn't as round and squishy as most Englishmen, nor as red and rosy or littered with freckles. It's sharp...long...angular...my eyes aren't as round and big as the rest, they are a bit more slanted. I just look...different. Everywhere I go, I feel like they all are just trying to figure me out...like I'm some strange creature they just can't put their finger on.
There's still been this burning question in the back of my mind, one I doubt I will ever get the answer too, just who is my father? I'm never seen a Japanese man around here ever....accept me, I suppose. But...I'm not even Japanese. I'm a mix breed. A freakish combination. Eyes, black as a void, impossible to even see my pupils. I think that is the most off putting thing about me to them, or maybe the fact I don't exactly have the dream feminine face. But I suppose that worked out in my favor in the long run. I don't think I would had survived as a woman.
I scowl down at my reflection in the puddle, trying to open my eyes as wide as they can go, just to see what I might look like if they were more normal. I just look like an idiot. I scowl and close my eyes, rubbing my at my temples in frustration. No matter, there's no time to be worrying and dwelling on all these stupid things I cannot change....i just have to hide them. But I don't have shiny armor like the rest of the guards. I never liked armor. Too heavy. Too loud. I like to take pride in my skill of stealth, but I do blame my "father" for that. If he even heard of my existence...a slap to the face is what I would get. I learned from a young age the skill of blending in, going unnoticed, being invisible.
I'm snapped out of my thoughts when I hear the loud horn echoing through the cool air, my ears peeking up at that wonderful sound. Finally.

It's finally recruit day. The day I've been waiting for all year. I've spent my whole life training with this precious metal blade of mine, and now....i think I'm finally ready to extract my plan. It's quite simple really: Go to the guard recruit station. Find a lone guard...and kill him. Take his heavy, clammy armor, put it on, cover my head and my eyes from the world to see. Sneak into the recruiting station. Show off my sword skills...become a guard. Get into the kingdom. Find Don. Save Don. I haven't exactly thought more ahead than that. I just know that every year that has passed, he's suffering in that damn castle, having to play as something he is not. I guess we are both doing that. I've been playing as someone I'm not my whole life, ever since I ran away. A woman cannot be a swordsman. Otherwise they would call it swordswoman. Women do not get choices in this world, they must be good wives and bear children to fulfill the last name of the grand husband. Well I will never be a wife. No one would wed a monster like me. So....being a man was my only choice. I used to be so ashamed of how my face looked as a child. Father would always laugh and tell me I looked more like a boy than a woman. "Those cold eyes of yours could never be mistaken for the eyes of a kind woman!" Maybe he was right. If only he knew that those words didn't hurt me...they had just gave me a wonderful idea.
I tie my hair back into a ponytail, standing up, staring down at my pocket notebook. I frown at the drawing, looking back at the fallen leaf. At least its memory will be forever printed onto this page.i close the book, tucking it away into my baggy clothes. Okay...time to finally extract my plan. It's been 3 years since this damn kingdom took him from me...and I'm going to take him back, and save my little brother!