The Secret Of Us

ten

It was hard for the next while. Everywhere I went there were cameras and screaming paps and interviewers asking insistent questions. They only cared about the baby, not about my career. The only people who still cared about my career were my friends and family, and of course my dear Swifties.

I spent a lot of time online when I was at Travis' house. I found comfort in looking through instagram or tiktok, at Swifties accounts to see how they were defending me. They'd all risen up against the media, saying it was my business, my baby, and they should let me be. It meant a lot.

At the beginning of March, I hit halfway. Twenty weeks pregnant. Baby was no longer measuring ahead but just perfectly average, and I'd started feeling soft kicks every now and then. My milk had started to come in, which was a little inconvenient. If I was ever out and heard a baby start to cry, I would leak through my shirt, which meant I had to start wearing a certain type of bra to stop that from happening. A breastmilk stained shirt wasn't what I wanted the cameras to capture.

"You could flip them off every time you go past." Jack suggested as him and Aaron and I were in the studio, brainstorming. 

"Yeah, that's a great idea." I sighed. "Good way to get myself in the tabloids even more. Oh look at pretentious Miss Swift, thinking she rules the world. I don't think so."

"I'm sorry you didn't have more time to keep this to yourself." Aaron rubbed my shoulder as he passed, dropping down onto the couch. 

"Yeah." I rubbed my swollen stomach. "Shit happens."

"You scared?" Jack asked.

"Of what part?" I sighed, resting my head on the back of my chair. 

"Well you've seen how big Kelce babies are."

"Oh don't remind me." I groaned. "I'm trying not to think about the fact that this baby is probably going to be huge."

The guys both chuckled, and I sighed at them, turning the conversation back to music. I appreciated their support, and sessions like this were most like therapy for me now. We'd taken a lot of sessions lately. Sometimes they needed it as much as I did.

Even though the session had made me feel a bit better, I still felt kind of awful. I'd been nauseous for the last few days and hadn't been able to stomach much, which left me crabby and irritated. Travis had put up with me, which I appreciated, and I was doing my best but I was pretty sure this would be a rough patch.

"How you feeling Bug?" Travis called out when I got home just before six.

"Mhm." I sighed, not able to find the energy to respond.

"Hey, come down here." Travis said, so I trudged down to the living room.

"Mom?" I gasped when I saw her sitting on one of the couches, talking to Travis who was on the other.

"Honey." Mom stood up, and I collapsed into her arms, hugging her close. "Hi my darling." She murmured, holding me tight. "My baby girl." 

"Hi." I sobbed, clinging to my mother. I felt like a baby being held as Mom sat me down on the couch, hugging me tightly. God it was good to see her. "You didn't tell me you were coming." I sniffed.

"I wasn't honey, Travis called yesterday and asked if I could. He said you were struggling and thought it might be good if you and I had some time together."

I looked over my mom's shoulder at my best friend, who was watching us. He smiled softly and I smiled back through my tears, so eternally grateful for the little five year old version of the man that I'd met all those years ago. I didn't know what I'd do without him. He did everything in this world for me.