All The Ways We Touch [BxB]

nineteen - catching fire pt. one

"Elliot..." Jamison muttered, his voice still heavy and groggy. Although his eyes were bleary, he instantly recognized the blob of dark chocolate brown hair. "Elli..."

Bolting upright, Elliot blinked rapidly and then rubbed his eyes as if he was worried he was still dreaming. But no, Jamison was staring back at him with that lopsided grin on his swollen face and loving kindness in his eyes.

"Jamison," he murmured, his eyes immediately welling up with tears. Unable to help himself, he pushed himself up and leaned in close to him, their faces a mere few inches apart. "I was so worried," he whispered, fat teardrops rolling down his cheeks. "I've been trying to find you since you left. I'm so sorry I didn't find you sooner. I swear I tried, I'm so sorry."

"It's okay, I'm okay," he assured, his cheeks flushing beneath the bruises, though they were too faint to peek through. Elliot could even make him blush when he was barely lucid. "It's not the worst thing I've experienced."

"Of course you'd say that," Elliot murmured, shaking his head with a soft smile. He'd never been so happy to hear Jamison speak, even if it was cryptically. 'If he's serious though, what else could be worse?'

This was the first time he'd seen Elliot cry and it made his heart ache, especially knowing it was because of him. The urge to comfort him and brush away his tears consumed his soupy thoughts and without thinking, he tried to reach for him, only for his eyes to go wide when he realized he was still restrained. Jamison's smile quickly faded and his heart began to race; the flood of adrenaline helping to pull him out of the sedation as the beeping on the machine next to the bed grew swift.

"Why am I still restrained?" Fear and panic had replaced all of the sleepy warmth in his voice. "Please, Elli, tell them to remove the restraints," he begged, struggling against the cuffs.

"I did," he assured, already in over his head and unsure how to redirect Jamison's attention. "They won't listen to me."

"Elliot, please!" Sucking in shallow breaths, Jamison began to hyperventilate, his eyes boring into him.

"They said that they'd remove them if you stayed calm without sedation," he said, a sharp pain shooting through his chest at being powerless to help him. Or maybe it was his own panic. Probably both. "So let's try and be calm or they'll come in here."

As he'd feared, the restraints sent him into a panic attack and he glanced back at the door, afraid the nurse would hear and come back to sedate him. Not that it'd matter, Elliot wouldn't allow them to, but he hurried over to the door and quietly closed it.

"I will, I promise," Jamison sobbed, looking down at the blanket covering his arms. "But I-I-I can't be calm like this, Elliot. Please. I'm suffocating!"

"Jam, I can't imagine how scared you are," he said, sliding back up to the bedside. As the machine beeped too rapidly, he frowned and licked his lips, trying to ignore the anxiety taking hold of his stomach. "But I need you to look at me, okay? Please, just look into my eyes. I'm here, I'm not going anywhere without you, and I won't let anything happen to you."

Sniffling, Jamison looked up at him, focusing solely on Elliot as his head grew woozy from a lack of deep breathing. All of those horrible memories were back to banging against the partition he'd created in his mind and he worried that if he took his eyes off of Elliot, they would completely overcome him.

"Okay, we're gonna breathe together, alright? First, we'll take a deep breath through the nose and then we'll slowly exhale through the mouth," he explained. "Just do it with me, sweetness," he said before slowly inhaling, keeping his eyes locked on him. The use of a pet name had gone unnoticed by him in his own panic.