All The Ways We Touch [BxB]

fifty-nine - a real victory pt. one

Despite a long soak in the salts that had specifically been crafted to aid in Elliot's post-swim recovery, his body hurt with each step from the library to the quad outside of the cafeteria. Jamison—and Ant, if he motivated himself enough to actually go to class—had an early art lab on Tuesdays, so Elliot had accompanied him to class and then went to the library to work on a project for one of his business classes. Though as much as he tried, he could barely focus and had spent the time drumming his pencil against his notebook and staring blankly at graphs on his laptop screen, his eyes frequently glancing at the clock to count down the minutes.

Now that he was on his way, he regretted how eager he'd been to get to the meeting. The racing pulse was already inching him closer towards anxiety, but add in the stomach clenching, and Elliot was ready for it to be over. It was difficult not to wonder if that was an indication that this was a mistake and that he wasn't ready for this conversation, but, unfortunately, Justin spotted him and began hurrying across the quad before he had time to back out.

"No boyfriend today?"

Elliot shook his head. "He's in class."

Nodding, Justin stared at him for a moment, waiting for Elliot to speak.

As Elliot looked around the busy quad, he caught a couple of stares, and although he gave them small but friendly smiles, he sighed and turned around. "Follow me." They needed privacy, and he knew exactly where to get it. After leading him across campus, he headed down towards the clearing.

"Uh, where are we going?" Justin asked, stopping in his tracks. It was likely that Elliot was angry with him, and going off into the woods together seemed like Elliot was looking for a place to unleash his fury. "I feel like you're luring me to my death."

"I just want some privacy," Elliot said, continuing on, knowing well enough that Justin would follow him despite his hesitation.

"I doubt anyone was paying that much attention to us," Justin said, rejoining him anyway. "I think you're being a little paranoid, dude. Or you're, like, tripping over your ego."

Now that pissed him off. When they got to the clearing, he went and sat on the fallen tree, then looked at Justin. "Paranoid?" Scoffing, Elliot rolled his eyes and folded his arms across his chest. "You may just think this is some ego bullshit, but people were staring, alright? They have been ever since that stupid article in that stupid fucking magazine. They're taking pictures of Jamison or me or us, and it's freaking him out. We have security but...what if this pushes him over the edge and he can't handle it? It's not uncommon for people to break up because they dislike all the attention, and he's not the type to want it, you know? At least not because of dating me. Maybe for his art, I dunno. But it's just..." he trailed off and looked up at the canopy, took a deep breath, and then looked back at Justin. "Sorry, I didn't mean to vent."

Although Justin had a successful career in swimming, he was less likely to gain attention, especially when Elliot was around, and yet, despite that, he was never jealous of him. Well, he did wish he attracted the girls that Elliot did. It wasn't in his nature to care about anything other than trying to be the best. One of the things that they shared was their focus on swimming, that nothing beyond their performance and time in the water mattered. It was one of the reasons that he loved training with Elliot, and why he was still determined to get him back.

"No, I'm sorry," he said, his voice softer. At least he was finally opening up. That was a step in the right direction. "I'm acting like I know anything that's going on in your life when that's not the case. I'm just being a jerk because it hurt to have you cut me out. It hurt all of us, you know that, right?" Elliot hadn't just blocked Justin, but the whole swim team.