Song of Shadow and Light (BxB)

Chapter 32

When Kaelan woke up the next morning, he didn't want to get up. He felt at peace being in Thaddeus' arms. After spending time together enjoying the sight of the fireflies, they found somewhere quiet to spend the night. The cottage was small and only had one bedroom where Faunus rested. Atticus stayed inside and slept on the couch, while Thaddeus and Kaelan found a small shed outside to sleep in. The nights were chilly, but being in the warrior's arms was enough to warm the cleric. 

Kaelan slowly opened his eyes, then glanced up at Thaddeus' sleeping face. The warrior was handsome; probably one of the most attractive men Kaelan had ever met. Looking up at him made Kaelan's heart flutter. He never would have guessed that he would be hooking up with this man. At the beginning of this journey, Kaelan preferred to keep his distance. He should have if he wanted to protect both of their hearts, but he was weak. He couldn't deny that he always craved attention and affection. It was something he lacked for so long, and his walls came tumbling down when he let Thaddeus in. He didn't think he could push the warrior away now, which would make their ending so much harder.

Once again, he found himself wishing this moment wouldn't end. If they could stay together, maybe even run away, then Kaelan wouldn't have to worry about his fate. He wouldn't keep thinking about the end. Part of him wanted to share everything with Thaddeus. Maybe they could find a solution if he told him about his fate. The warrior was intelligent and reliable. Maybe he would know what to do. But Kaelan was afraid to bring up the subject. He was afraid there was nothing they could do, or that Thaddeus would try to sacrifice himself instead. Maybe Thaddeus would even be mad at him for keeping such an important detail from him for so long. There were still many portals they still needed to close. It might have been better to talk about it now instead of waiting until their final moment.

Thaddeus stirred beneath him, then opened his eyes. When he noticed Kaelan looking up at him, he smiled until he saw the look on the cleric's face. He rubbed his back and asked, "What's wrong, Kaelan?"

He didn't think he could answer him. He opened his mouth, but no words came out. At some point, Thaddeus deserved the truth. He needed to know the obstacle at the end of their journey eventually. It would be selfish of Kaelan to keep this a secret from him. While Kaelan hoped Thaddeus would meet other men along the way, that still wouldn't prevent the pain of losing Kaelan. He would still be heartbroken.

Kaelan buried his head against Thaddeus' chest. He couldn't tell him, but he promised himself he would before it was too late. Instead of responding with the complete truth, Kaelan answered, "I just don't want to continue our mission right now. I know it's important, but I want to stay with you. Being with you like this is . . . nice."

"I understand. Though, as much as I would like to continue lying with you like this, we should get back to it. The quicker we defeat the demon lord, the quicker we can return to our home in Merania. Besides, we'll have plenty of opportunities like this in the future. I have many plans with you after this is all said and done," Thaddeus said.

His last words piqued the cleric's interest. "Plans? Like what?"

"Like . . . finally being able to settle down with you and possibly have children. I'm going to put so many babies in you." Thaddeus looked at him with a smirk.

Kaelan blushed. "Y-you know that's not possible! I'm a guy. I can't have children."

The warrior chuckled. "That's true, but it's the effort that counts. At least it won't be from a lack of trying. We'll just have to adopt children."

Kaelan didn't know if Thaddeus was serious about adopting. He didn't seem like the type of man interested in taking care of a child, but there were still many things Kaelan didn't know about him. The thought of starting a family did sound nice, though. Kaelan never considered having a family other than Azai. A family was never in his cards, but that didn't mean Kaelan couldn't fantasize about it. Faunus mentioned things seemed different this time around. Maybe there was a chance his fate could be different as well.