Chenford Oneshots

Regrets And Mistakes

A/n: This is what I hope to happen in season 7 (fingers crossed) between chenford. Disclaimer: I don't want them to immediately get back together because I think it defeats the purpose of the plot. 

Tim sat in his therapist's office shaking his leg nervously. It was only his third session but Dr. Hughes had already impacted his feelings and brought down walls he didn't know he had. Mostly it was stuff from the past; his relationship with Isabel, his Dad. But some was about Lucy. He had started therapy a week after their breakup as he knew he needed to work on himself. He felt an immense amount of guilt and sadness when he saw how bad she was doing afterwards. He just wanted to pick her up in his arms and take her home and protect her from anything bad that could ever hurt her. But this time it was him. He had hurt her. Not intentionally but he did. His mouth made the decision before his brain had registered the possibility. 

He was pulled out of his trance as his therapist finally brought open his file and started speaking. "Tim, what do you think is at the root of your struggles in relationships?" Dr. Hughes asked, her gaze steady and encouraging. Tim looked at the ground in search of the answer. "I've always had a hard time being vulnerable," he admitted. "I don't want to let anyone in because I'm scared of getting hurt. Or in Lucy's case I didn't want to hurt her."

"Those fears can manifest as avoidance," she explained. "You've pushed Lucy away because you were afraid of what it meant to let her in. It's crucial to acknowledge this if you want to rebuild your relationship." Tim nodded, the weight of her words sinking in. He needed to change, not just for himself but for Lucy.

After his session, Tim decided to reach out to Lucy. They hadn't spoken much since their breakup, but he hoped she would agree to meet. When she arrived, there was a tension in the air.

"Hey... Tim," Lucy said, her voice cautious but warm.

"Hi, Lucy. I've been going to therapy, and I want to talk about it," he said, trying to sound confident even though his insides felt like they were about to come up.

"Okay," she replied, her interest piqued, sitting down at the table Tim was seated at.

"Lucy, I know I hurt you deeply when I shut you out. I can see the pain in your eyes, and I regret the way I made you feel. I take full responsibility for my mistakes. I let my fears dictate my actions, and I pushed you away when I should have leaned on you. I'm truly sorry for the way I treated you and for breaking your trust. Losing you has made me realise just how much I value our relationship. I realised that I pushed you away because I was scared of being vulnerable and hurting you. I'm learning to work through those feelings, but I need your help," he admitted.

"First of all, thank you, that means a lot for you to open up and acknowledge what happened and for wanting to work at it to strengthen whatever we have left. It won't be easy. Second, it's definitely going to take time. We can't just jump back into anything and there is a possibility that we will just be friends at the end of this - nothing more." Lucy said softly in return.

"I get it and that's completely ok with me. I would rather still have you in my life than completely lose you. You're one of the most important people in my life."

"I feel the same way. What did you have in mind?"

"I know what I did wrong - from my perspective. But I need to know from your perspective what I did, so I can change both." Tim explains looking into her eyes for the first time in weeks.

She took a deep breath, gathering her thoughts. "You shut me out when I wanted to support you. Instead of leaning on me, you isolated yourself. I felt like I didn't matter."

Tim nodded, his heart aching at her words as he looked down at the table. "I see that now. I'm sorry. I want to be better. For you. And for us. Whatever that is."

Lucy gave him a warm smile with sad eyes as they said goodbye and left.

Days turned into weeks, and Tim continued to attend therapy, actively working on his issues. They would see each other at work most days and almost always they would greet each other and ask about their day. One evening, they both ended up getting out of the change room at the same time, so they walked together out of the station, the air crisp and cool, Tim felt compelled to open up further.

"Lucy, can I talk to you about something?" he asked, stopping to face her, as they got to the carpark.

"Sure, what's on your mind?" she replied, her gaze steady.

"I've been thinking a lot about our breakup and why it happened. I pushed you away because I thought it would protect you from my issues, but all it did was hurt you," he confessed.

Lucy looked at him, her brow furrowing. "Tim, I don't want you to feel like you had to protect me from anything. I wanted to be there for you."

"I know, and that's what I regret," he continued. "I let my fear of vulnerability dictate my actions. I thought if I broke it off, it would be easier for both of us. But it just made everything worse."

"It's hard to hear you say that," she admitted, her voice soft. "You didn't have to go through it alone."

"I thought I could handle it. I thought I was being strong, but I see now that strength is being able to ask for help. I shouldn't have pushed you away," he said, his heart heavy.

"I appreciate you sharing that, Tim," Lucy replied, her voice filled with empathy. "It means a lot to me that you're willing to confront this."

They turned together and continued towards their cars and Lucy grabbed his hand holding it comfortably. Tim looked at her face but she stayed looking ahead and they broke apart and got into their own cars and drove away. It wasn't much but it was something. And that's all that mattered.

As time passed, Tim continued to learn and grow. In therapy, he explored the reasons behind his avoidance and shared his insights with Lucy, who offered her support and encouragement. Each time they had a difficult conversation, they felt their bond strengthening.

One evening, during one of their sessions, Dr. Hughes asked Tim, "How do you feel about your relationship with Lucy now?"

"I feel hopeful," he replied, glancing at Lucy, who was sitting across from him. "I'm learning how to be vulnerable, and it's making our relationship stronger."

Lucy smiled, her eyes shining with pride. "I'm proud of you, Tim. It's been a journey, but I believe in us."

As they left the session, Tim took Lucy's hand in his. "Thank you for standing by me. I won't take your trust for granted again."

She nodded, leaning into him as they walked. They had ridden together after work so they hopped into Tim's truck. "Going to therapy has opened my eyes to my own insecurities, and I'm learning how to communicate better. I don't want to hurt you again. I love you, and I want to show you that I can be the partner you deserve. I'm committed to rebuilding your trust, no matter how long it takes."

"I love you too. Your an amazing person and we have been through a rough patch, sure, but we are stronger then it" Lucy holds up their hands and continues "This. We are proof of it. I know we can do it." Tim smiled at her and for the first time since the break up he planted a sweet gentle kiss on her lips. Together, they were ready to embrace whatever challenges lay ahead, determined to rebuild their love, one step at a time.