the next few months go by in a blur. Even tho I haven't hurt Kali since, I won't lie and say I haven't come close. At one point, she had to sleep in the other room, cuz nobody trusts me to be alone with her at night.
I don't even trust myself.
I'm going fucking insane. It's too much bruh. I can't even move without hearing violent threats rush through my head.
Jarad, ally and Charlton went back to Chicago a couple days ago. Now it's just Ski tryna keep me sane
Nothing new to be honest. Stokely has always been there to keep my grounded. When Kali was gone, the only person I really had was Stoke. No body wanted to be near the kid that beat niggas up like it was a normal Tuesday
Nobody wanted to even associate themselves with me. Nobody wanted my name in they mouth.
Until I got money. Untill I found fame. Niggas didn't wanna know me until everyone else wanted to.
But stoke, stay wit me.
And now, he's still here, spending time tryna keep me from Kali neck, when he could be doing his own shit. I got so much love and respect for him.
It's 3am right now. I went to the studio, and pulled up a beat, sampled form a song called 'im god'
As soon as the beat kicked in, I just started to freestyle.
I ain't pissed, just a nigga sneak diss me Make this pussy nigga fuckin history Get murked, murk em with a ruger That'll blow right through yo motherfucker Real shit, you a real bitch on the streets All you talk is shit, but you don't do shit And you don't walk bitch
I freestyle a lil bit more, and when the song end, I go over it a couple times, and decide to just release it.
It helped a little bit to more music. It focused my head and made my mind go quiet for a while.
As I drive back to my house, I find Stokely lying on the sofa, and it don't look comfy. This nigga do to much for me.
I walk upstairs past Kali room, and see her door wide open. Luckily, today has been a little more quiet than others. The only urge I have is to go and sit with her. Enjoy her company, something I haven't been able to do for months.
But I shake my head and keep on walking. I have no idea how fast I can just switch. I promised myself I wouldn't hurt her again.
When I reach my room, I go into my bathroom, and pull out a box of white hair dye I bought on the way back from the studio. I stare at myself for a while, and then I get to untwisting my dreads.
Kali POV
I wake up and immediately feel sad. I've barely been around Jahseh these last few months. I'm starting to think I should just go back to Chicago for a while.
I get out of bed and change into:
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As I walk down the stairs, I find Stoke half on half off the sofa. I chuckle softly and put a blanket over him.
I walk into the kitchen to find Jahseh Already there. For the first time ever it's awkward. Probably cuz my jaw is on the floor
His hair. It's white. Like white white. I'm shocked. I loved his split hair. It was such a statement.
I quickly fix my face and smile at him.
'You hair... it's different' I half laugh
'Yeah I uh... got a compulsive urge to do it last night. Took me hours. Did not sleep at all.' He murmurs
'It looks good. Let me see the back' he turns around and I see he's missed a small chunk of hair while he was twisting it, and all the dreads were painfully uneven.
I giggle, and he laughs, knowing he's done a questionable job at this. 'Do you want me to do your hair Jahseh?'
He looks down and embarrassedly smiled. 'Yea please'
I nod and gently hold his hand. He looks at my with a wairy look, but I smile at him and show him I'm not worried if he does anythin.
I lead him to the bathroom and sit him on the side of the bath.
Ok so I wanna start doing more pics of outfits cuz I got loads that are super cute in my camera roll and Pinterest.
Anyway, this bout to get kinda sad but in a good way....so... yeah.
