Lizzie: I need 28 lightbulbs for 28 ducks.
Joel: Ducks can't eat lightbulbs?
Jimmy: I think that's the point.
Lizzie: Exactly. I want my ducks to glow so I can find them.
Lizzie: COMPANY IS COMING! I WANT THIS PLACE LOOKING LIKE DISNEY ON ICE IN ONE MINUTE!
Lizzie: KATHERINE IF YOU HAVEN'T MADE YOUR BED THROW IT AWAY IT'S TOO LATE TO MAKE IT NOW!
Lizzie: GET RID OF THE COUCHES, WE CAN'T LET PEOPLE KNOW WE S I T !
*The Squad is on a hike*
Joel: It's beautiful out here.
Jimmy: And quiet.
Joel: Too quiet.
Jimmy: Did we lose someone?
*cut to Lizzie with a bear in a headlock*
Joel: So you like cats?
Lizzie: Yeah.
Joel: *tries to impress her by slowly pushing a glass off the table*
Lizzie: Sure, you're verified on twitter, but are you verified in the eyes of god?
Jimmy: Good morning.
Lizzie: Good morning.
Pix: Good morning.
Katherine: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit.
Joel: MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS!
Jimmy: Hey besties-
Lizzie: Die.
Jimmy: What did I do to you-
Joel: What's up with you?
Lizzie: What do you mean?
Joel: You've been nice and helpful and considerate all day. What's your game?
Lizzie: I can do anything I put my mind to. I once figured out Jimmy's phone number just by choosing random numbers.
Pix: How has life been treating you lately?
Jimmy: Horribly.
Joel: Coca Cola can remove rust from metal, imagine what it's doing to your body.
Lizzie: Pfff, getting rid of the rust, idiot.
Joel: THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS!
Jimmy: Hmm... I've been drinking soda and my body's rust free... not sure where you're getting your facts from...
Jimmy: Joel is forbidden from monologuing.
Lizzie: I'm a firm believer in "if you're going to fail, you might as well fail spectacularly."
Joel: Did you just refer to a knife as a "people-opener"?
Lizzie:
Lizzie: ...Should I not have?
Joel: Help! I'm drowning!
Joel: Calm down. We're only in six feet of water!
Joel: NOT ALL OF US ARE TALL!
Pix: I keep a picture of all of us in my wallet. Whenever I face difficulties, I take it out and stare at the picture.
The Squad: Awwww-
Pix: And I tell myself "If I can deal with these idiots, then I can deal with anything."
The Squad: Oh.
Lizzie: I am your king, long may I reign!
Jimmy: Well I didn't vote for you!
Lizzie: You don't vote for kings.
Jimmy: Well how'd you become king then?
Lizzie: Joel of the Lake, his arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Lizzie, was to carry Excalibur. That is why I am your king.
Jimmy: Listen. Strange people lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.
YOU ARE READING
Incorrect Quotes
FanfictionThis is basically just a big Incorrect Quotes book about the fandoms @MultiFandomFox (or me) is in. it will probably be mostly MCYT, tbh... but I hope you enjoy! It may hold quite a bit of my AU's, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. &l...
