Storm of Colors: Eeveelution Adventure Story

a new experience

Phoenix, if he was going to be completely honest, had already begun to regret his life decisions before being dropped twenty thousand miles away from where he was half a minute ago.

Nonetheless, when a nondescript bird Pokémon (that was definitely not a Pidgey) ambled past Phoenix in the equally nondescript meadow that surrounded Phoenix, he finally realized the situation he was in.

"Ugh. Is that a Starly?" he whimpered. "Man, what did I sign myself up for?"

"What? Never seen a Starly before?" barked the Starly, head swiveling towards him. "You wanna go? I'll snap your spinal cord, you little-"

"Am I in Kanto?" interrupted Phoenix. "There aren't any Starlys in Kanto. You guys are native to Sinnoh..."

The Starly's expression traveled through surprise and understanding before settling into a look of mild disgust.

"This is such a generational issue," it muttered. "Can't use Teleport responsibly."

Phoenix's left eye twitched. "So I'm in Sinnoh."

The Starly shrugged, unfolding its wings. "Not my problem," it sang before fluttering away.

"Unhelpful little bastard," mumbled Phoenix, pacing in the grass and staring up into the empty sky. Finally, he sat on his haunches and sighed. "What am I gonna do now?"

"Would you quit moping and figure something out?"

Phoenix turned. A rabbit-looking thing he couldn't recognize shuffled awkwardly out of the bushes behind him.

Phoenix stared. "I know what you are! You're that thing that evolves into Lopunny! Which, by the way, is obviously blatant furbait."

The Buneary scowled. "Says the one who looks like a charbroiled Eevee with diabetes. And actually, I'm not a Buneary, so you can lay off."

The not-Buneary leaned conspiratorially towards Phoenix, who leaned away, since it is not customary to listen to the rants to senile old bunnies. The not-Buneary, seeing his politely concerned expression, glowered angrily. Suddenly, the air around the strange Pokémon began to glitch. The image of a Buneary peeled and faded like an old vinyl sticker, leaving a floating pink cat in its place–the unmistakable Mew. Then, just as suddenly, Mew was gone, and all that was left was an innocuous looking rabbit Pokémon, gazing back at Phoenix smugly.

Phoenix blinked. "Okay."

"Yeah, that's what I thought."

"So," continued Mew. "Lemme give you a quick rundown of the mess you put yourself in. I mean, the noble duty that you have taken upon yourself. You, random Flareon, must find and deliver a message of peace to Heatran. Then, if you value your pathetic mortal tourist time, I recommend you to eat turkey and give thanks until Shaymin takes pity on you. Maybe you'll catch a once in a lifetime Shaymin sighting! Anyway, capisce?"

"No," said Phoenix. "Those instructions are vaguer than Ikea do-it-yourself manuals."

"Ughhhh," complained Mew. "Fine, I'll give you the whole flippin' explanation. It's gonna be long and tedious, though."

Phoenix settled into the soft grass. "I've got time."

Mew shrugged. "Well, it all started with a few Pokédexes, a comedian duo, and a rich girl..."

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"... and then Team Galactic was disbanded, Looker arrested the bad guys, and we lived happily ever after," finished Mew.

"Really?" asked Phoenix.

Mew snorted. "Of course not. Sird hasn't been arrested yet, Shaymin is probably traumatized, and I have crippling depression."