Squidward couldn't think of the last time he messed up so badly. Was it April Fools? Or no no wait was it the time he said he hated Spongebob's gift to him? Or was it the time he encouraged spongebob to wear a maid outfit and serve him breakfast? Or the was it-? Squidward decided not to remember every single one of his bitchy moments because that would take... how old is he? Squidward rubbed the deep wrinkles on his forehead before laying his face into his tentacled hands. Squidward has unpacked his rocky childhood so many times. He gets sick of this reflection every time he messes up, but when will he stop hurting people? Squidward thinks his upbringing molded him into the cold, sometimes harsh cephalopod he is today and that he will be like that forever. He knows deep down that's a cop out so he'll never see himself as the source of the problem when he is. He decided to write a note to Spongebob's grandma that started as an apology:
She doesn't need to know that!!?? Ok one more time
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Squidward woke up and saw Grandma Squarepants looking down at him. Did he fall asleep on his 73rd draft of this apology letter? Way to go, Squiddy! You blew it again! Before he could start to leave in defeat. Grandma Squarepants gave him a knowing look and lead him to her kitchen. "Cookie, dear?" she asked. Squidward wanted to politely decline but when the scent hit his nose he was a goner. He just nodded and granny slid a plate his way. "You're a good friend of my grandson! He talks about you aaaall the time" ouch if Squidward didn't feel bad before he definitely did now. What good things did Spongebob possibly have to say about him? As if Granny read his mind she continued on "good AND bad things" oof. Squidward remained silent as Grandma stared deep into his eyes. "why do you look so sad?" she asked him and finally he answered "because I keep messing up... because your grandson is so kind and I don't deserve it" Grandma chuckled and took squidward's empty plate "I knew I raised that boy well" "pardon my sass but you raised him more than good he's a pushover, ma'am" She turned to him and he saw not anger on her face like he expected and not sadness either. Worse- disappointment. In that moment she looked so much like Spongebob.
"I'll tell you why Spongebob and I are too nice and maybe pushovers like you say. When we care about people so deeply we want them to see the best and worst parts of themselves. If we always snap back every time we are pushed around the people who really need to reflect will blame us. BUT if we stay kind, if we stay smiling even those who lash out the most will eventually think to themselves- what am I doing??"
Squidward opened up "I ALWAYS think what am I doing? But never change. Spongebob doesn't deserve to be around someone as angry as me. You don't either." Squidward opened the front door and was face to face with Spongebob. Was this a set up? Did Spongebob's grandma invite him in so they can make up? Squidward turned to her and she had a smirk on her face as if to say "I can't believe you really thought I was a pushover"
What Granny was actually thinking was: why am I helping my 30 year old grandson with his crush
Spongebob looked completely unamused. "grandma you can't just-" she cut him off "TALK. TO. HIM." and Granny left the room.
"Squidward" Spongebob said coldly
Squidward was frozen. Spongebob sighed and finally caved in "what were you talking to my grandma about? About how much she babies me?"
"NO-" Squidward quickly interjected before remembering their conversation "well yes but-"
"Wooooow" spongebob cut him off "I can't believe she just sat there and took that"
"she didn't actually! She showed me the strength kindness takes. I'd say it was eye-opening but I always knew that from watching you"
Spongebob blushed slightly. Once again silence. Spongebob cleared his throat "go on.."
Squidward half-heartedly chuckled thinking Spongebob was joking before realizing OH HE WASN'T UHHH before Squidward could choose his words carefully he word vomitted "Bikini Bottom is full of miserable people I'm always on the defense, it's a default and it's weak. But it's also the best way to connect with these surface-level fish. But the only friend I need here is you. You have such a strong sense of self. You inspire me and- and- UGH I'M SORRY, OK???? I know those words don't mean much considering how often I say them but I really mean it I care about you more than I can say-"
Spongebob grabbed Squidward's shirt and pulled him close it almost seemed like they were going to kiss before "WHO WANTS MORE COOKIES" Grandma Squarepants said in a sing-songy way!
"IM FULL" Squidward shouted before bolting towards the door. Embarrassed beyond belief. Spongebob seemed to be dismissing him too "SEE YOU TOMORROW AT WORK, PAL!!!" but Grandma Squarepants sensed something was... off. She insisted Squidward stay for cooking, dancing, clarinet playing and even though Squidward was intent on leaving somehow he had the best time ever with Spongebob's Grandma and Spongebob! Such wholesome fun that it took his mind off everything else until...
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"Goodnight Squarepantses!" Squidward moseyed his way home singing his usual song to himself "ladadee ladadoo ladadum! ladadee ladadooooo" he reflected on his day of music and art led by the supportive older role model he never had! How did this all start again? He remembered the apology and SPONGEBOB'S RESPONSE!!!!!!!!!!! OH NEPTUNE YEAH WHAT WAS THAT?????? Hopefully Spongebob forgot briefly from all the fun like he did.... He probably did! Right???????
