If Only...

Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Cathy~

“Ms. Mildred, Doctor Wilson is ready to see you.” Heather, the receptionist said with a smile. I really didn’t want to do this, but good old dad said that it might help me move on. Unless I moved far, far away from this part of the country there was no way that the people around me would let me forget about what had happened, even if I managed to go on living my life. Some things just didn’t work that way.

I tried to muster up my courage and put an ‘I don’t need this’ face, but I was scared. I didn’t want to talk to anyone about what had happened. But since I was here, might as well go and see what the man said. I expected him to be old, gray hair and glasses but as I opened the door that was not what I found.

It was the man from church that had come up and talked to me last Sunday. I wonder if that was why he did it. He knew I was coming to his office and wanted to establish some sort of relationship before I ever entered his office.

But the look on his face told me otherwise. I could tell that he wasn’t expecting me. His mouth was slightly ajar, and in his eyes, bewilderment.

"Cathy Mildred?" He asked as if not comprehending that I was, in fact, standing right in front of him.

“Hi” was my response back. I felt very awkward and unsure about this. I already didn’t want to do this, and this was just icing on the proverbial cake.

He stood and offered me a seat in a comfy couch across from his chair. I hated this. I wanted to leave. He didn’t need all the gory details of my past.

“Yeah, um, my real name is Catherine. People call me Cathy.” I said, looking down at my hands. Now that I knew who my doctor was going to be, I really didn’t want to be here.

“So what would you like me to call you?” Dr. Wilson asked softly. I could feel his eyes on me, but I couldn’t manage to look at him. Why was my dad making me do this? I didn’t need help. I could help myself.

“If it’s okay with you, I’ll call you Cathy. And you can call me Taylor. I like to keep things on a casual level. I’m not a stuffy person and I don’t like my patients to feel uncomfortable. Is that alright with you?” Taylor asked softly. His voice was so soothing. I like to just listen to his voice.

“Listen, Taylor, I’m not sure what my dad told you, but I really don’t need this. I’m perfectly fine. He doesn’t think so, but then again, he’s so over protective once he has his mind set on something he convinces people to do things his way.” I said playing with my hands, still not looking at him.

“Well how about we just have a talk about life? You know a friendly chat. If anything gets too personal and you don’t want to talk about it, feel free to say so. I don’t offend easily, so feel free to say what is on your mind.”

“Okay” I said reluctantly. I really didn’t want to do this.

“Since I saw you at church the other day, is it wrong to assume you are a Christian?” Taylor asked in his quiet way.

“No it is not wrong to assume that. I’m a pathetic excuse for a Christian though.”I said the last past without thinking and I could tell by his brief silence Taylor was trying to figure out the true meaning behind my words.

“How about I say a quick prayer for us before we begin?” I looked up and met a beautiful pair of crystal blue eyes.  I nodded and we both bowed out heads.

“Dear Lord, we come before You thanking You for this wonderful day that You created for us to enjoy. Thank You for Cathy and her willingness to be here today. Help us and give us guidance as we start on this friendship and give Cathy the peace and comfort that only You can. In Your Son’s Holy name we pray. Amen” His prayer was nice, and it calmed me some. I was technically not new to the whole Christianity thing, but it had been a while and I had to relearn the ropes.