Neutrino Blues

Chapter V

REDHEAD

Matty

We were staring at a computer screen panting like two perverts. I was biting my lower lip and Jimbo was licking his which gave his mouth a shiny lip balm look. We were doing it! Finally, a payback after years of hard work. Finally, we could afford one of them – at least.

- Maybe we should get two?

- Man, let's not get too crazy. I'd say we get one for starters and see what's she made of.

The shape of her body, especially her hips and thighs, was killing me. I wanted to put my hands on her pronto and I could fully understand why Jimbo wanted his own right away. Yeah, me too but they're expensive and we didn't even know what we were doing. We were just like two kids who happened to grab their first porn mag ever. Salivating like dogs and blushing bright red. Two kids who happened to be pushing thirty. Maybe it was a little immature of us to be doing what we were doing but you have to deal with goodbye-twenties crisis somehow. When your first and second decades finish you're too high on life to care or even notice but when the third one is coming to an end, you get sentimental and reflective. You mentally browse your bucket list and, well, sometimes you come up with weird and retarded shit. Something you've never done before but always wanted. Your unrealized kiddy dreams resurface and hop on that anti-celebratory pro-consolatory mood. We were twenty-nine and wanted to leave the third decade with style. With her. Inside her. One on each side. Enough room for two.

We agreed to go all the way to Italy to get one of them beauties because that's where they're born. You've got to explore the source if you want the real thing. If we like her, we'll take her with us. If. Funny, how could we not. We've seen so many pictures and videos so far that there ain't a shadow of doubt in our minds about that. Not if, only when.

Now.

- So, which one do you like?

- All of them!

- Yeah, me too but... we have to choose one.

- Definitely one from the nineties. They're symmetrical and their ears are just right. Look, those from the eighties look like someone was drunk while at it.

- Damn, that's a proper turn-off. Why would anyone...?

- Beats me, man. Maybe Italians like it this way. Or it was some kind of accident.

- Definitely from the nineties, then. Has to be in mint condition, too. We're not going all the way across the ocean for something we could get over here.

- How about this one?

Yes, she was just perfect. Looked as fresh as if she's just been plucked from a tree. At that age. Wow.

- You're going to make the call?

- Do you think the owner speaks English?

- No idea. So email it is. We'll see, we'll see.

And we did see. As much as there is to see. Started with the sea, also affectionately referred to as the pond, between Americas and Europe, our first time ever to the old continent. So far we've only toured the States, Canada and Mexico which suggested that we haven't made it that big yet. Pushing thirty makes you reflective. We need to expand but first things first.

Once we landed in Bologna, the nearest international airport to our destination, we rented a Dodge Avenger to support domestic industry and headed off on a redhead hunt. I cunningly let the boy drive having an ulterior motive in doing so. We were both crazy about driving but this time I outsmarted him. Knock yourself out, boy. My time will come.