My Life: Congrats, You Lost Me

Chapter 5 - Moving On

***April 30th***

I stare down at my shaky hands, clenching them into fists trying to keep them from it. I thought he'd be glad I was going somewhere better. I thought he'd be happy for me, for me moving forward. I thought...

My head shoots up as I hear the door creak open. Becca was peeking in worry shrouding her face. "Jessie, what's going on?"

"It's nothing Becks, it's just an argument. Don't worry about me." I wipe my eyes trying to keep them dry, or at least from dropping. Becca moves forward and sits on the bed next to me. She bumps my side, making me wince but settles in soon. "I promise Becks, it'll be all better soon."

"Don't lie to me Jess. I know what's going on, I could hear Allan yelling about something. He said you were leaving. Where are you going?" Her voice was filled with worry and cracked a few times, almost like she was close to tears. I reach my hand up and cup her face.

"Don't worry about it Becks, I'm not going to leave. I'm not going anywhere. I'm sorry you had to hear and see all of this. I could've done so much better for you."

"Stop it Jessie, you're talking like you're dying or something. Y-you're okay, right?"

"Yeah, I'm fine Beck, I just wish I could've done more to keep you from her, from that monster, Lindsey."

"I just want you to stay with me and be okay." She holds out her pinky and looks up at me. "Pinky promise you won't leave, and if you do, you don't stay gone forever?"

"I promise," I whisper and I link my pinky with hers. "I will never leave you forever, not until the day I die. I'll always be back. Always and forever." I smile down at her with a sad smile and kiss the top of her head. "I love you too much to stay gone."

"I love you too, sissy." She nuzzles her head into my chest and starts to fall asleep. I smile and wrap my arm around her waist before starting to nod off myself.

****May 1st****

I wake up at around 2 o'clock in the morning and notice that Becca was gone. I bet Allan came in and got her to bed. He takes good care of her. I sit up and put my feet on the floor. I look over at my folded up wheelchair. I sigh and grab a pen off of the side table. I pull out a crumpled piece of paper from my pocket, one of the notes. I scribble on the back which has no writing on it.

Allan,

I'm sorry, I love being here with you and Rebecca, but I have to leave. I'll be counting down the days until the end of the school year for you and her. I'll come back then. Tell her I'll be back. Tell her that I love her and I would go to the ends of the Earth for you both. Tell her you'll take care of her. Keep her safe Allan, I could never bear to lose her. I have my phone with me, but if you try calling me today, I won't answer. I won't answer until its been a few days. You can't convince me to come back early. You can leave me all the messages you please, but I won't call back. I love you both too much to say this in person. I have to go now.

I love you,

Jessamine Taylors

I stand up on the floor for the first time in a while, it feels great to stand but also hurt so bad I thought I'd scream. I walked over to my drawer and pull out my cash box and phone. I open my box and count my money. I had just over $700, that would be enough for the motel and some bus fare. I close the box and slip it into my sweatshirt pocket. I grab my bookbag and put my clothes into it after taking out my school books, next I grab the rest of my stuff and shove it down into the bag. I pick up my note from the bed and slowly walk into the living room. I hold the note in my shaky hand and see Allan asleep on the couch. It's a good thing he's a heavy sleeper. I put the note in his hand and walk out the back door with my bag.