{ p s y c h o // shawn mendes fanfic }

eleven

CHARLOTTE
•••
Cameron is yelling into his phone receiving dirty looks from other people around the hospital.

"i'm sorry, but i'm not a part of that anymore. i want to live a normal life for once." he pauses then continues, "i don't give two flying fucks about what my dad thinks. he doesn't control me."

i realize me and Shawn are standing in front of the door way watching Cameron yell. i think we're both curious as to why he's so pissed but we're also smart enough to know approaching him wasn't the best idea.

"lets to the garden in the back." Shawn suggests quietly. i nod remembering that there's a beautiful garden here so you can sit down and relax while a loved one could possibly be dying. like an escape from reality.

we sit on a bench and he puts his arm around me. i lay my head on his shoulder and look up to the sky. it's almost dark. it's been quite a day. it feels like i've known Shawn for... forever. we sat in silence, but its not awkward. not a silent moment between us has been awkward.

"tell me about yourself." Shawn randomly says. "you want to know about me?" i ask him softly. "yeah. if i'm fake dating you, i ought to get to know you." he responds shifting his body closer to mine.

i sigh and decide to start from the start, "i was born on December 1st. i was supposed to be due a week later but my mother was already going into labor. i have an older brother named Sammy, Sammy Wilkinson. he has been my rock, but is also a douche to everyone in college. all he does is drink, and hook up with girls, but i know he's better than that. my dad left us when i was born. i never met him. that's why i was jealous of you and you're dad. you guys have an amazing connection and i'm left fatherless. my childhood was alright. i met my best friend to this day when i was in preschool. it was tough knowing my dad wasn't there. my mom got me to believe he was on a very long business trip. i learned the truth when i was 13. that left me depressed wondering if he left because of me. i developed anxiety issues and i started to self harm myself. this was a reoccurring thing up until high school where i met Cameron after a school dance. i thought he was a student at out school but turns out, he was practically the same age as Sammy at the time. that didn't change how i felt for him. he asked me out and i said yes. we went on such a romantic date. then he asked me to be his girlfriend, i said yes although our parents weren't too stoked when we told them. we didn't care though. then he disappeared one night as he was staying over at my place. no calls, no text, no contact from him ever since. that broke my heart. then two years later, i met a wonderful guy named Shawn Mendes." i look up at him and he's smiling as he plays with my hair. i continue,

"even though we've known each other for less than 24 hours, he could truly be my boyfriend since he knows my life story." i change my position to where i'm lying on the bench using Shawn's leg as a pillow. not the best pillow, but i liked it.

i look up to see Shawn's reaction but there is none. he's just smiling at me still playing with my hair. he finally speaks up, "can i be completely honest with you?"

"of course." i say sweetly. 

he sighs and says, "i like you. i like spending time with you, laughing with you, talking with you. you're different, i can feel it. i just wish Cameron wasn't here. i know this sounds horrible but i wish you thought he was still missing. i wanted to be the one at 3 am hugging you, telling you things were going to be alright." i sit up and face him, looking him straight in the eye, "Cameron isn't here right now, so what are you going to do about it?" by this point, our lips were 3 inches apart.

he glances at my lips and all of a sudden, his crashes into mine. i can feel butterflies enter my stomach and  everything else kinda just vanishing. it was only me and him, and that was enough for me.