I am Sabrina

I'm home

I ran to the car and removed all trace of my makeup and changed clothing I stuffed my shopping bags in my duffle bag swung it to the back seat before driving home. I thanked god the lights weren't on when I quietly stepped into the house. I walked up to room feeling relieved I didn't slip up and get caught for the first time in seven years. I opened my door and set my bag down and quietly took off my jacket. When I had gone to take off my studs in my ears my light turned on. "Where have you been?" Damn I looked in my mirror and saw my mom and dad sitting on my bed. I turned around with my hands behind my back. "Um hey guys." My dad stood up "don't hey guy's me! Why were you out so late?" I rolled my eyes "its Saturday it's not like it's a school night." My mother said lightly to my father "that's not the point, and since when are your ears pierced and are those hoop earrings?"

I was officially caught "Mom i-"I was interrupted by my dad grabbing my arm "Are these fake nails?" my dad scared the shit out of me and he was the last person I wanted to piss off" my mother stood up as she yelled "What's going on with you?" I sighed as my father threw my hand down to my side and walked to go stand with my mother in front of me. I can't tell them there was no way I could ever let them know what I was actually doing "Mom, Dad I wasn't doing anything bad I'm not sneaking around with boys if that's what you think" I was frozen did I really just say that. My dad walked up to me and slapped me across the face I felt the tears roll down my burning cheek. My mother broke down into tears just as I thought she would, but I never thought it would actually happen. "Mom I-"My dad raised his voice so loud I felt the vibrations in my body "SHUT THE HELL UP EREN YOU WILL NOT DO ANY OF THIS SORT OF THING TO YOUR MOTHER AND I. WE LET YOU DO THINGS IN PUBLIC BUT YOU'VE GONE TOO FAR YOU NEED TO LEARN YOUR PLACE, YOU ARE NOT AN ACTUAL GIRL YOU WERE BORN A BOY AND THAT'S WHAT YOU WILL REMAIN" was this really happening? I looked in the mirror and saw my lip had been busted and slightly swollen from the hit. My biological name is Eren but I refuse to use that name. The only people that know about me are Mikasa's family and my parents. Eren is gone now and forever. I looked in the mirror again and said to myself "You can't stop me, if you restrict me it will only get worse I am Sabrina so stop calling me Eren that's not my name anymore"

I spent Sunday nurturing my face. No one in the house really talked that day but everyone acted pretty normal. My mom made breakfast and we sat at the table and ate. As I bit into my food my mother whispered "Why?" my dad intervened "Clara don't" she banged her hands on the table and I flinched "NO I want to know why I want to know everything." I looked up and she was already in tears "it started in sixth grade. Mikasa let me borrow clothes and I guess I just had really girly features. When Mikasa began to wear makeup in the seventh grade I did too. We did everything together and eventually everyone just assumed I was a girl and t-the boys would give me attention and I liked It. but I'm not doing anything with any boys!" my mother continued to cry as I continued my story "I've always liked the name Sabrina so for the past six years I've been going by that name." My mother didn't say anything she just whipped her tears and continued to eat. My dad was the one who spoke "Well we are not going to be living like some crazy dysfunctional family. You have a credit card so buy whatever the fuck you want but don't expect my love I remember being told I was to have a son, but I guess he's dead now." I was angery but mostly hurt "Are you saying that I'm dead to you?" no answer. Then I remembered he just said I could buy whatever I wanted "Wait really so I can have a surgery right!" my father finished his food and looked at me, he was disgusted. "If you want it I'll sign for it but you have to set everything up." I tried not to show too much emotion but I wanted this to happen like tomorrow. I finished my food and ran to my room.