I am Sabrina

Say Jean do you remember the first time we met?

(Sabrina's POV)

When I woke up I expected to be in hell. I expected to be surrounded by sorrow and nothingness but what I saw was blinding lights. The hospital, I didn't want to live I'm not even sure If I still do. "Sabrina oh my god" I was welcomed with the arms of my mother. "Sabrina what happened! Why did you do that" I looked at my mother and told her "because I was raped. And he told everyone my secret" her face went from happy to broken. I know she wanted to ask who but I couldn't bring myself to say his name. Throughout the day I was visited by the police and friends who I both refused to talk to until Levi showed up. For some reason I felt like I could trust him with my life "Hey um I wanted to check up on you, I heard you weren't talking to anyone "Yeah I just had nothing to say, you didn't tell, why?" I could tell he was shocked because of how easy I talked to him. "Empathy." "Empathy?" "Yeah I put myself in your place and if anyone told without my consent I would be pretty mad" he rubbed the back of his neck I smiled "Thanks. I think I'm ready to talk just only if you're there with Me." that defiantly caught him off guard "uh yeah okay." Just as planned we had to put up a fight for Levi to be there as I made my statement to the police. But we got what we wanted in the end. They did testing on me for any evidence of semen in my body, there was a trace in my body. I asked to not know the outcome if him (Roddick) as long as I never saw him again.

Once back at school Levi told me to stick with him for my own comfort. Many of my friends tried to talk to me but I had no need to talk to anyone but Erwin and Levi. I wasn't emotionally stable for school considering that my secret is probably all over the school campus. Oddly enough I didn't hear any talk about it. No one gave me weird stares or called me names what was going on? "Levi" "Hmm?" "What happened at the party?" his facial expression showed that he didn't expect me to ask about that night. "Well um personally I saw you talking to that French kid then I hadn't seen you for at next thirty minutes. After that I had gone into my room to grab my car keys but then I saw you there. I put a blanket on you and played with your hair. Then you passed out and I realized your head was bleeding. I called the ambulance then here we are."

I was so confused. Why would he forget about Rodrick announcing to the whole party about my secret. Had I imagined it? "Oh" for the next two weeks I didn't talk to anyone but Levi and Erwin. On Monday I felt the need to apologize to Jean and the others for my silent treatment. When I walked up to them there was a crowd. I pushed my way to the front mostly making the boys nervous by'accidentally touching them with my boobs' . Once I was at the front what I saw shocked the hell out of me. Connie and Jean were fighting.

I imminently ran up to them and my first instinct was to yell "GUYS WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING STOP" The crowd went silent and I felt a sharp pain. I felt myself hit the floor grabbing at my nose. One of them hit me and my nose started to bleed. I covered my nose as the blood Sept between my fingers. Connie rushed over to me "Oh god Sabrina I'm so sorry" I slapped his hand away and said "What the hell is going on!" Jean looked at me with tears in his eyes. "Jean what the hell? Connie what's going on?"

Connie looked away once we met eye contact. Sasha came up in-between them and looked at me "I'm pregnant" I still didn't understand "Ok but why the hell are Connie and Jean fighting!" she looked down "I-it, the baby is Jean's." my heart skipped a beat my eyes grew big and I felt dizzy I looked towards Jean "Sabrina i-"before he could finish I ran. I ran to the bathroom I felt like I couldn't breathe. I grabbed some toilet paper and held it to my nose. I dropped to the floor crying. I didn't care about anything anymore I dropped the toilet paper I was holding into the toilet and threw up. Fuck.  What's happening to my life? What's happening to my body? Why do I feel so numb? I think I love Jean.

Graduation is next week and I haven't said a word to Jean, Connie, Armin and everyone else.

Why Jean? Why?

I was accepted to the University of Maria in Tokyo. I put on a show for everyone and I didn't shed a tear towards anything since I found out about Sasha. I was actually looking forward to leaving for Tokyo.

The day I was set to leave I took one last look at my room, I noticed something that wasn't there before. A rose and a small card that said "I Love you -Jeanbo" I didn't bother picking it up I just told my parents to leave it the way it was. I wonder if he would still love me if he knew my secret. That I will never know.

Hey Jean I'm in my third year here in Tokyo at the University of Maria collage. I now know that Roderick didn't say anything at the party and that I imagined it but it still felt so real. I met a boy he knows my secret. It makes me happy when he says he loves me almost every second of the day. His name is Tyler he's an artist and moved here for school too. I've also got a new friend named June she and I aren't that different. Even though you still had so much to learn about me I felt like we had grown up together. I still wonder to this day how things turned out with you and Sasha, I have to admit that left me pretty hurt. I wonder if I will ever see you again. I want to tell you that I forgive you I never got the chance to say that I love you too I actually don't think I will ever stop. I really wish to see you again.

Say Jean, Do you remember the first time we met?