Abomination (Ryden)

Chapter 11

It's about a week and a half later (one full of Ryan and I basically making out pretty damn h-core everyday) when I finally decide it's time to end it with Ethan.

I don't necessarily want to, but I know I have to. I have to come clean and tell him the whole truth about Ryan and my feelings and just ugh. I hate my life.

On Thursday night, I tell Ryan about my plans. He goes a little red, and I can so tell there's a huge grin waiting to come out, but he manages to keep it down and goes, "Oh, cool." And to my dismay, he says absolutely nothing about Dayna... not that I really expected it or anything. I guess I just kind of hoped, but whatever.

When I get to Ethan's the next day, I've barely gotten three feet in the door before we're making out furiously, stumbling towards his living room couch, and I'm dropping my jacket to the floor and his hands are working on my jeans and I kind of forget the whole reason why I came here in the first place.

Then, I run my hand up his arm, and I feel hair and muscles opposed to Ryan's smooth, lanky ones. And when I go to run my hair through his hair, I'm stopped by messy, thick dreads opposed to Ryan's soft, silky hair that I've grown used to these past couple of weeks. And then, well, then I remember.

I pull away, and it really sucks because after a week of really intense make out sessions with Ryan freaking Ross, and absolutely no way to get off except for my hand after he leaves is getting very difficult. And, it's only been like, a week.

"Ethan, we need to talk." I say, doing my pants back up and I sit down on his organic couch (how couches are organic, I have no idea, but Ethan, of course, manages to find it).

He stands there, staring at me with his mouth slightly open, because he's obviously confused. I probably would be too, because I'm pretty sure I've never stopped one of our little... sexcapades like, once in the past year we've been together. Not even once. "Oh... kay..." he says, and he takes a hesitant seat beside me on his couch.

I fiddle with the hem of my sweater, and I stare down at the ground. There's a long pause, and Ethan's the first one to break it by going, "Actually, I have something to tell you too."

I look up at him, eyebrow raised. He looks worried, and maybe even a little guilty too, and it makes me feel a little bit better to be completely honest. "Oh yeah?" I ask hopefully.

He bites his lip and nods.

So, I decide, well, if he has something to tell me I might as well just get it over with and he's obviously thinking the same thing because when I go, "I cheated on you..." he says the exact same thing, at the exact same time.

Then we just kind of just sit and stare at each other with his marijuana clock ticking in the distance. And I'm kind of like, Whoa. Did that actually just happen?

Slowly and quietly, Ethan begins to chuckle, then, I soon follow, until we're both practically rolling on the ground giggling and hacking up a lung like us cheating on each other is the funniest frickin' thing we have ever heard.

"Shit," he goes, and wipes a stray tear from under his eye. He takes a deep breath, then laughs a little more before continuing, "Here I was, all freaking out the past few days, trying to figure out how the fuck I was going to tell you, and you were cheating on me all along."

I start laughing again, and he starts along with me, and we're back to laughing like complete idiots.

After a few more minutes pass, I catch my breath, sit up and go, "Look... Ethan. I still care for you and I mean, I still do have feelings for you..."

"But you really like this other guy more," he finishes for me, and I cant tell if he's upset, or mad, or what, because his voice is just completely emotionless.