Abomination (Ryden)

Chapter 23

I get to school a little earlier than usual the next day, so I decide to go up to Ryan's locker and see if he's here already. We've still got twenty minutes till the bell rings, so I figure we could have a quick make out session in the downstairs bathroom. Yeah, I know, wishful thinking, but shh. I can dream, cant I?

However, when I reach his locker, he's there alright, but of course, Dayna's there with him. She doesn't look upset either, oh no, she looks completely fucking giddy and just, the happiest person on earth as she clings onto Ryan's arm as they laugh and kiss. But, really, why am I surprised? It's not like I actually thought he was going to break up with her.

She presses a kiss to his jaw, and giggles some more. And fuck, I hate her so much. Why can't I just be her, God? Life would be so much easier.

I'm just about to run away, and cry, when Ryan turns, and sees me, standing there, eyes red and lip twitching. He stops, dead in his tracks, smile fading completely. He looks between Dayna and me, Dayna and me, then I don't really stick around to see who he's gonna look at next, because I'm stalking off down the hall, arms around my waist, forcing back the tears. Because really, how embarrassing would it be if I just burst out crying in the middle of the hallway, and in front of her at that?

When I'm near the end of the hallway, by the back staircase, I hear Ryan call my name, but I just keep going. I'm done. It's over. I can't do this. He's obviously not going to break up with her, and I cant fucking stand sharing him anymore. He's probably not even gay. He's probably bisexual, and he doesn't actually have feelings for me, he's just playing me along. And all of this was just some big joke, and he actually really loves Dayna and not me, and...

"Brendon! Stop!" Ryan cries, and this time he's right there, breathing down my neck. He grabs onto my shoulder, and pushes me back into the wall, cornering me. "Stop," he repeats, voice firm.

"No, Ryan, you stop!" I cry, and I can't even help as the tears fall down my cheeks. And, it's like, great, now I'm the one bawling my eyes out. Except as my luck has it, I'm in the middle of the school hallway - and thank god, it's empty. "I'm so fucking sick of this, okay? If this is all our relationship is ever going to be, I can't do this, okay? Just tell me right now. Honestly, are you ever going to break up with her?"

"Yes, I told you I would," he says, biting onto his bottom lip. He's so close, I can feel his breath spill against my lips.

I shake my head. "Yeah, well, it didn't look like it."

"I just ran away from her for you without saying a word. And it's not like I can just break up with her at school, or on the phone, Brendon." He sighs. "I'm going to tomorrow, okay? I'm going to her house. I mean, I would have even done it tonight but my dads being a dick and telling me I have to stay home. But I promise, I'll actually do it this time."

I sniffle, and hiccup, and let my head drop against the wall with a thud. A few seconds pass before I go, "Why does it have to be so fucking hard and dramatic with us? Why can't it ever just be good?" I wipe my wet cheeks with my sleeves.

He grabs onto my hips and pulls me into him. "I don't know, but it will be eventually," he whispers. He presses his nose against my cheek, and adds, "I love you, okay?" He tilts his head up and presses a soft kiss to the corner of my mouth. I note that he doesn't even look around to see if anyone is close enough to see, even though I know there isn't.

I swallow, and nod as I rest my head against his shoulder. "I promise, I will," he repeats, soft voice trickling down my neck. He keeps his arms around me, and I sniff, and nod once more, against his slender shoulder.

We stay like that until multiple voices begin to flood the hallway, and I find myself slightly surprised that Ryan didn't pull apart right at the sound of the first distant voice.