Always

9. heading home.

Peeta's POV. 

I'm watching the time slowly reach four pm. I start to get antsy and start to shake. I need Katniss. I need her. It's different this time. I haven't seen her in two weeks. I need answers. I need to hear her say if she loves me or not. I need to understand the differences between real and not real. 

I made a decision to myself while I have been going crazy watching the time. If I go home and Katniss doesn't love and chooses to be alone or even with, ugh, gale, then I will take a night lock pill and end my fate. There is no life for me without Katniss. No hope, no future, nothing without her and I know it sounds depressing depending on someone else for your life, but she is all I have left. My family is all dead and I'm just alone. I want a family again but with Katniss. I just really hope she says real. 

I hear my door open, and I see my nurse come into the room. 

She has her cart filled with the heart monitor and pills set up in order, a bottle of water and other hospital needs. 

"Hello Peeta." she says with a smile. 

I smile "hello Laura."

She smiles and looks at me, "you happy to go home?"

I nod. "Very, I will miss you though helping me with my meds and also giving me small therapy talks."

She smiles and looks at me while she listens to my heart. 

"Oh Peeta, such a sweetheart you are. You are an amazing young man, and over the past two weeks I've seen so much growth in you faster than other patients."

I smile. " Thank you, Laura."

She starts giving me my meds one by one and I take the water bottle and swallow them one by one. I hand her the empty water bottle, and she takes it from me and throws it away in her miny trash can on her cart. 

She takes my temperature and a blood sample and mixes it with whatever she has to mix it with to see if my blood still has hijack venom in it. 

I watch her slowly and start to get scared. They haven't found a trace of the venom in my blood in the past week. I'm scared that if she finds it in my blood that my home departure will be longer. 

She looks over at me and smiles. 

"All clear, 100% all you Peeta."

I smile and breathe out with a relief. She looks down at me and frowns. 

"Anything you need to talk about before I leave?"

I look at her and motion her to the chair across my bed. 

She walks over and sits down. 

"A couple of things, one, I know I have no venom in my system but why does my mind still get wired when I'm angry or have flashbacks?"

She sighs and looks at me. "You are clear, but your mind is all wired different now, with the medication and your own intentions all of those wire changes will be flipped back to normal and with time, and a tip, find something that brings you pure joy and your mind will readjust back to the loving memories before the wire, don't give up Peeta!"

I smile. I look back at her. "Will I ever see you again?"

She smiles. "I am your permeant nurse but anything now Peeta, I will be going to the district 12 hospital so I could be closer to you for anything, also I can do home checks weekly if u sign a paper agreeing to them."

I nod. "Where do I sign?"

she laughs. "I will have your mentor get you all the forms and he will send them to me when I reach the hospital in a couple of days."