Between the pages

Chapter 28 The price to stay awake

The thick snow blanketed the world outside, leaving the world beneath a luminous pale veil. The white expanse stretching as far as the eye could see. The cold, biting wind howled against the hospital windows, but it didn't matter to you—your body was too frail to be touched by the winter air. 

Giyu stood behind you, his hands brushing through your hair in a quiet, tender rhythm as you sat by the window, staring out at the snowflakes that drifted gently to the ground, dancing in the cold wind. The snow seemed to go on forever, filling the world with a quiet stillness, and for a brief moment, you allowed yourself to forget the aching weight of your body.

It had been a week since you last managed to speak more than a few words. Each day, it became harder to even eat, your strength slipping away like sand through your fingers.

He placed something soft against your ear, a small gesture that made you turn your head to see what it was. It was an iris, its deep violet petals contrasting the pale, cold landscape outside. The flower's vibrant color stood out against the quiet whiteness of the room, like a small piece of warmth brought from another season. Its smooth, velvety texture lingered on your skin, and you couldn't help but marvel at the beauty of the simple gesture. 

 He sat beside you, his gaze followed yours out the window, watching the snow swirl outside.

"What's so interesting out there, Y/N?" His voice was low, amused, but it carried a weight of concern beneath it. "It's just white and cold.

You tried to respond, but the only sound you managed was a small wince, your throat tight and raw. You sighed and pulled your phone out, typing with trembling fingers.

𝘐 𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘴 𝘸𝘢𝘭𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥 𝘰𝘶𝘵𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦

He looked at the words you typed, and you could see the understanding in his eyes. His gaze softened, a quiet sorrow tucked beneath his calm exterior. You leaned your head against his shoulder, feeling the warmth of him beside you as he spoke.

"Sorry... I can't do much."

You closed your eyes for a moment, letting the feeling of his presence soothe the ache in your chest. You knew he was doing everything he could, but there were moments when words couldn't ease the hurt. The simple act of being there was more than enough.

—-----------—

Time moved slowly within the walls of the hospital. Each day blurred into the next, filled with the overwhelming weight of pain and exhaustion. You had been coughing up blood and petals for what felt like an eternity now, each spasm leaving you weaker than the last.

It was unbearable. The pain was like a storm inside you, tearing through your body, and the exhaustion was slowly dragging you into the dark. You wanted to sleep, wanted everything to stop.

But still, you couldn't bring yourself to let go. You didn't have the courage to end it, even though each breath felt like a battle. Whenever you tried to sleep, you were jolted awake by a sharp gasp, the pain refusing to let you escape into rest.

The only thing keeping you sane was him.

It had all started in the gentle warmth of spring, where the air was filled with the promise of new beginnings. Your story... began on a vivid spring day, where the world was awash in the vibrant hues of fresh blooms and the soft hum of life stirring anew.

But now, as the first snowflakes began to fall, drifting softly from the sky, you could feel the unmistakable shift of seasons. The world outside, once alive with color and bloom, had transformed into a silent, white landscape.

And with the change in the seasons, everything around you—everything within you—had changed too. The certainty that once anchored you now seemed distant, like something you could no longer grasp. Time, like the weather, had moved on, and what had once felt solid and unyielding now seemed fleeting, fragile, like a moment slipping silently through your fingers. The world outside had transformed, and in turn, just like all beings, so had you.

"Giyu..." The name escaped your lips, weak and ragged, a fragile whisper that seemed to struggle through the weight of your exhaustion. It was barely audible, yet it was enough to catch his attention. Your voice felt distant, like the words were drifting away, carried on a breath that seemed far too fleeting. In that moment, it was as if you had called his name out of instinct, knowing that even in the midst of everything, he would be there.

He would always be beside you, unwavering, no matter how much time or distance had passed.

He turned toward you, surprise flashing across his face. His eyes softened as they met yours, filled with something close to desperation to hold onto the little moments you could share.

You smiled—an expression that was so genuine, so filled with an emotion you couldn't quite name. It was pure joy, even as blood seeped from your mouth. The petals followed soon after, delicate and soft, but they didn't stop you from finishing your thought.

"S-Sorry... You had to spend most of this year in a hospital... B-but thank you for staying with me..." The words were agonizing to say, each one a battle against the pain. But you needed to say it, to speak the truth that had been lingering in your heart for so long. You needed to tell him—not through texts, not through gestures, but with your own voice.

Before you could continue, Giyu moved swiftly to your side, enveloping you in his arms. His touch was gentle yet firm, pulling you close, and he placed his hand softly over your mouth, halting any further words.

He looked at you with deep, unreadable eyes, and a single tear slipped down his cheek, tracing the curve of his jaw. He kept his gaze locked with yours, never breaking the connection.

Once he was certain you wouldn't say anything more, he removed his hand from your mouth, wiping away the blood that had stained the side of your lips.

His voice was calm, soothing, as if his words could erase all the pain.

"I told you countless times... You don't have to apologize. You don't have to thank me..." 

The tears that you had been holding back finally escaped, slipping down your cheeks. But this time, you weren't alone. You leaned into him, resting your forehead against his, and for a moment, the world outside—the cold, the snow, the pain—vanished. It was just the two of you, holding each other in the quiet, you seeking comfort in his warmth, in his unwavering presence.

The world outside was cold and distant, but here, in this moment, there was a fragile peace between the two of you. The pain, though still there, felt a little easier to bear with him beside you.

As you rested against him, you couldn't help but reflect on the song that had lingered between you both. It was never spoken aloud, but its melody had been woven into the fabric of your time together—those words, those quiet promises, whispered softly in your heart.

In your mind, you both sang the song in perfect silence. The lyrics were always there, like a comforted whisper between the moments of pain and exhaustion. It was something you had shared in your thoughts, even when words had failed you:

"Hold me through this dark night,
Hold me 'till the pain fades,
Tell me that it's alright,
Show me that the warmth is true.
Please, stay, keep me for forever,
Please, say that we'll be together,
Hold me in the darkness,
Even when the pain bleeds through.
It's a little bit better."

The song wasn't just a song—it was everything. It was the quiet promise, the hope lingering between the heartbeats, the warmth between you, even as everything else seemed to fade. Neither of you had needed to speak the words aloud; they lived in the quiet moments, in the spaces between each breath, each touch.