1) ESFP: WHOO! SKYDIVING! ENFJ: I'm actually kind of nervous about this because it draws a parallel to me and my life. Everytime I'm not prepared, I fall farther and farther down with a faulty parachute, which severely increases the impact of the fall... ESFP: *stares blankly for a hot minute * No worries! It's just the first time skydiving jitters. Unless you are a daredevil, most people experience this. Here, lemme help you! *violently shoves ENFJ off the airplane* ENFJ: AHHHHHH! ESFP: Pull the parachute! *dead silence ESFP: ENFJ? ENFJ: IM OKAY! ESFP: Phew! That was a close one.... 2) ISTP: Time to throw some axes. ENFP: Do they have any gift shops in these stores that sell butt wipes? I used leaves and a chamber pot earlier and I suspect that my homemade toilet paper was actually laced with poison ivy sooo... imma need some lotion for that. Or scented candles. Either one will work. ISTP: *looks extremely puzzled* Sure... right this way. ENFP: My butt cheeks are on fire right now. ISTP: TMI.... 3) ESFP: (mouths) Yeah, dude I've been very sick recently. I can't talk because of my sore throat. ISFJ: Awww, I'm so sorry about that. Here. *pulls a cotton candy flavored cough drop out of her purse* Here you go! *also gives ESFP water and tissues* ESFP: (mouths) You just have some spare cough drops lying around in your bag? ISFJ: Actually, yes! I've got a whole army in here! *pulls out ten bags of cotton candy cough drops* ESFP: *starts laughing silently* (mouths) Why do you have so many? Wait, please don't make me laugh- I'm scared I will accidentally choke on this ENTP: *comes in and starts cackling* That is hilarious. It's like your vocal cords blew out so you'll have this terrifying croaky gremlin laugh while you're choking on a cough drop! *mocks a voice impression* Ahhh! Someone call the exorcist! Oh, never mind, he's choking to death. Spare the Holy water... ESFP: *does their best to suppress laughter * ENTP: Hey, you! Do you speak any Spanish? *looks ESFP dead in the eye and says slowly* Voz espeluzante que se atraganta con Una pastilla para la tos. ESFP: *silently cracking up* ENTP: Oh my gosh, dude, I'm about to give you some Holy Basil. Welp, I gotta go now, but you take care guys! *chuckles* I feel so bad leaving ESFP here in this state. Should we call him an ambulance for the laugh gas attack? 4) ESTP: Yo mamas so dumb, she tried to save a fish from drowning ENTP: Yo mamas so dumb, she screamed into an envelope to leave a voicemail! ISTJ: Can you guys keep it down with the yo mama jokes? I am trying to do my homework, for Pete's sake. ESTP and ENTP pause for a moment, look mischievously at each other, and start whispering ESTP: Yo mama's so ugly, she made One Direction run the other direction ENTP: Yo mamas so ugly, she made Hello Kitty say goodbye ISTJ: Grr... *skips to a compilation of ENFP just being the grossest person ever on accident ENFP: I tried to do this really common executive pose, but instead of looking intimidating or sophisticated like those with shorter fingers, I look like I am about to pick my nose. Speaking of which, in the UK, I believe they call that "digging for gold", only, instead of finding 24 carrot, you get a booger collection ESFP: Eww... ENFP: Hold on! I need to talk about childbirth for a second ISTP: OH LORD ENFP: When you birth the placenta, what does one do with the umbilical cord once the baby is done with it? Do you throw it out? Do you keep it in a jar as a souvenir? I've actually heard of some people making it into pills and eating it as nutrients INFP: You're not far off. I've actually heard of that, too! ISTP: *mutters* OH MY GOSH... ENFP: *chuckles* You can perhaps use it as a rope to get yourself through the window if you are locked out of the house, or maybe go Texas style and use it as a lasso for cowboys ESFP: That is actually disgusting— holy shit INFP: *starts choking on air* INFJ: *sighs indignantly * I'll handle this. It's okay, INFP. It went down the wrong tube again. Just use some breathing techniques and you will be okay. INFP: *passes out due to the lack of oxygen* INTJ: *gives a cold death stare* ESFP: Ahh! You scared me, dude INTJ: *stares darkly* I'll help you dispose of the body ESFP: Pardon? ESTP: Yo mamas so fat, she had to get baptized at sea world! ENTP: Yo mamas so fat, that when she hopped on the scale, it said "I need your weight, not your phone number" ESTP: Yo mamas so fat, when she sat on a rainbow, skittles popped out ENTP: Yo mamas so fat that like, even the body positivity movement couldn't take her ESTP: Yo mamas so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing! ENTJ: *mutters* DAMN ENFP: Guys, would it be possible to explode your stomach if you had enough food? INTP: How much food are we talking? ENFP: Like, the whole grocery stores worth of food. I would not have the funds nor the stomach capacity for that, but I would be really curious to see if someone could blow their intestines from eating too much. ISFJ: Would you like to see a therapist to address some of your psychological issues? ENFP: *pauses and considers for a moment * Nah, I'm good. *cackles* You get all your vitals just spewing out like a waterfall through your belly button. "Oh no, it's going to rupture again! Get a mop and towels ready!" ISFJ: I think I'm gonna go. ENFJ: *practicing yoga in the corner* UMMMMM ISFJ: *shakes head and walks away* ENTP: Yo mamas so short, I had to pick her up and place her in the palm of my hand to bring her to McDonalds ESTP: Yo mamas so gay, she could no longer taste the rainbow ENTP: Dude what? ISTJ: *starts foaming at the mouth and barking like a ferral animal ESTP: *whispers* Is he okay? ENTP: *whispers back* I think we drove him insane. Again. ISTJ: Woof! Woof! *starts sniffing around for dog kibble* ENTP: *whispers* He's got a crazy Tom Cruise smile ESTP: What? ENTP: Observe. *shows picture*
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ESTP: GOOD LORD!
ENFJ: *wakes up from long yoga session* Hey everyone! Who wants to play ping pong?! *looks around to see the house in chaos, everyone running around like ferral animals, and all the furniture on fire* *sighs hopelessly* I always miss all the drama, darn it...
