I Hope You Forgot

chapter thirteen

Dear Harry,

I know it's been a while since I actually wrote a letter. I haven't been in the mood lately. Maybe one day I'll give you this box and you can read through all the letters from all the years. I probably won't though. I'm such a wimp. Grr. Okay now I'm just being weird. I just have nothing else to write I guess. Well..erm.. bye...

Love,

Kat x

I sighed and tossed the letter into the box. I've been laying in bed practically all day everyday now that I'm home. It's not healthy for me and I know it. But I just don't feel like getting up.

It's been exactly two weeks, 7 hours, 56 minutes and 32 seconds since I've been home.

It's been exactly two weeks, 9 hours, 57 minutes and 42 seconds since I last saw Harry.

And the boys and Melissa but.... you know... Harry...

I'm thinking about him 24/7 and it's driving me crazy that I can't see him. I guess I can blame some of that on myself for being stupid enough to get on that plane. Now I have to wait a year, 4 months and two weeks just to see him again.

I mean... them again.

Screw it, I mean him.

And honestly...

I. Am. Going. Crazy.

I feel different. Empty. Like something is missing. Like an incomplete puzzle. I know what and who's missing but I don't want to admit it. Not to my parents. Not to Korie. Not to Mel or the boys. Not even to myself. Why? Because what if he moved on already? What if he forgot about me?

No. That kiss at the airport told me he wouldn't forget. But...

What if he didn't feel the sparks like I did? What if he didn't get those little butterflies in his stomach, or feel his heart pounding against his chest like I did? What if he's done with me? Or he fell out of love with me?

All because of one kiss, though? I don't think that's very logical.

But what if that's what happened? What if when we see each other again he hates me because I left like I said I would?

He won't. He loves you. You don't just fall out of love with someone very quickly. If he really loves you, he won't forget. He won't hate you.

I sighed and put my head in my pillow. I'm going insane. I keep having this battle with myself because I need to know. I can't sleep or eat or function. At all.

Everything reminds me of him. E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G.

Whenever I turn on the radio, I hear either a song or some news or some rumor about me and Harry.

Whenever I turn on the TV, no matter what station, either there's a One Direction singing doll commercial, or they're talking about us.

At school more people have been trying to talk to me or ask me about me and Harry's relationship.

And on Twitter?

People. Are. Insane.

I sent out a tweet since I've been home saying "Sorry for all you Karry Shippers out there. It's over. @Harry_Styles" and the fans went nuts.

"KARRY IS OVER? NOOO!!!"

"But.. but.. Karry is my OTP.. whut.. no.."

"HAHA LARRY IS REAL SUCKAS!! #LarryForLifeBitches" (an // me currently)

"Eh.. never shipped it anyway.."

All kinds of things. My phone went off, breaking into my thoughts and pulling me out of them. I leaned over and unplugged it from the charger to check the messages.