One Direction ~ BSM & BSF & DDM

Louis (25) BSM - Miscarriage

It had been days since Y/n had left her bedroom. She'd been staying with Louis throughout her whole pregnancy, up until the day she'd been told the worst news of her life. That was when her world froze, and Y/n's future was changed in a heartbeat - or rather, with the lack of a heartbeat.

...

"Y/n, come have some breakfast, love," Louis prompted his younger sister gently, sweetly rubbing her back as she lay on her stomach. She hadn't yet gotten out of bed, though the clock read 12:34pm. 

"I'm not hungry," Y/n mumbled, her voice sounding less like it always did, without her usual cheeriness and bright attitude. Louis sighed sadly,  taking ahold of her hand and stroking her palm with his thumb.

"You need to eat, please, darling-"

"I said I'm not hungry." Y/n's tone was firm and blunt that time, and so Louis paused for a second before bending down to give his sister a soft kiss on her forehead.

"I'll leave you alone for a little bit." Then he left the room. Only a few minutes later, Y/n was overcome by an uncontrollable wave of emotion, and couldn't do anything to stop the silent tears from staining streaks of pink over her cheeks. All she could think about was her innocent, baby angel. Her baby angel who never even got to see the world outside her womb, and who now rested in the stars, unnamed and unknown. Y/n hadn't told anyone yet, but she'd had her heart set on giving her baby girl a middle name that was their mother's first; Johannah, and letting Louis choose her first name.

She thought about all the things she'd never get to do with her baby, all the things she'll never get to say to her and everything she wishes she could show her. Y/n had wanted to take her baby girl to the park she'd always loved when she was a kid, but that couldn't happen anymore. She'd wanted to take her shopping when she was old enough to style her own outfits, but that'd never happen either. The dreadful realization that none of these beautiful things would ever get to be experienced by her baby girl broke Y/n's heart, and it made her cry for a long time. She cried hard, so hard that she eventually fell asleep.

When Louis came back two hours later, Y/n was in the exact same position he left her in. He walked over to her bedside and saw her closed eyes and heard her even breaths, and realized she'd fallen asleep. Some heartbroken version of a smile made it's way onto Louis' face as he went around to the other side of the bed and slid under the covers. Turning his sister over and pulling her into his chest protectively, Louis held Y/n for as long as it took for her to wake, then she slowly looked up and around at Louis, who had his arms wrapped around her waist and back, cradling her head in the crook of his neck.

"Hi, sweetheart," he murmured, kissing the tope of Y/n's head. Y/n sighed in contentment, though there was an obvious hint of sadness to her voice. She relaxed her body a little more, knowing she was safe in the grasp of her older brother.

"Hi, Lou," Y/n whispered back. 

"I'm going to look after you, okay? I'll look after you as long as you need, and even when you don't think you need me, I'll still be here. We can get through this. You can get through this. I know you can." Louis softly stroked his sister's hair as he spoke comforting words to her. Y/n heard his words clearly, but she still had trouble relaxing her heart and finding peace with the horrible event.

"Why did this have to happen, Lou? I was going to be a mum. I wanted to be a mum. Why did my baby have to be taken away? Haven't I lost enough people I love?" Y/n's anguished voice broke Louis' heart, and he did his best to hold her a little closer and make her feel loved.

"Y/n... I don't know why she had to be taken. I don't know why things like this happen. It's just like when we lost mum, and when we lost Fizzy; we don't have any control over the situation and we can't help the sad things that come in life. It's painful, and it's unfair, and it makes our hearts hurt for a long, long time. But, what we can do is keep on living, and keep moving forward." Louis paused for a moment, saying nothing, but rubbing Y/n's back soothingly. "I always knew you were going to be an amazing mum, there isn't a doubt in my mind about that. And, you know, any child that comes into your life is going to be lucky to have you. You are strong, capable, beautiful inside and out, and more than anything, you love. You love, and you love hard, like there's no tomorrow. I know you're going through a difficult time right now, but I can't wait to see your gorgeous smile, and hear you giggling and laughing like you do every day. You'll feel okay again, I promise. It might take some time, but you'll be okay. It'll all be alright, and you'll be okay, darling."

Louis' words left Y/n speechless for a long few minutes, and she made no sound other than the quiet sniffles and slow breaths Louis could feel on his neck.

"I hope you're right, Lou. I hope you are, because it hurts. It hurts so much, I want it to stop, I don't want to feel like this anymore. I need you. I just need you. All I need is you, and nothing else. Please stay with me?"

"Always, love. Always."

___

I hope this is okay!! I tried my best... though, part of me thinks this BSM is really cringey :(