The Unwanted Life

Breakin' Up And Breakin' Down

"I don't know if I can do this again." He slumped his head down and sighed heavily. "But," I paused and smiled slightly while he looked back up. "But, I'm willing to try." He smiled from ear to ear and pulled me in for a hug. "Wait, only under one condition." Ryan pulled back, but left his hands on my arms.

"Anything, babe." I lowered my head along with my voice and took in a deep breath.

"Please don't do that to me again." I looked up into his eyes and he was looking in the other direction with a hurt expression on his face. He turned his head towards me and gave me a sad smile. He nodded in agreement and then lead me towards the living room and turned on my favorite movie of all time, Harry Potter.

We sat down on the couch, me sitting on his lap with our hands entwined together. Once in a while he would whisper sweet nothings in my ear causing me to smile and blush. Time after time he would kiss my neck leaving his warm breath behind that would cause shivers to go down my spine.

During the movie I must have fallen asleep because I was awoken to the sound of my phone ringing. I looked at the collar ID with wide eyes. It was my dad. I haven't seen or talked to him in almost a year. Ryan noticed my reaction so he asked with concern, "What's wrong?"

"My dad is calling right now. He usually only calls me when something wrong happens." I answered the phone, reluctantly pressing it to my ear. "Hey, daddy." I said with a hint of worry in my voice.

"Hey, Sav. How are you?" he sounded as if he was hiding something.

"I'm okay. Is there something wrong?" I asked scared of what he might say next.

"Yeah. I have to tell you something." I didn't reply because I didn't want him to go on, but he did any way. "Your grandmother is concerned about you and your sisters. She thinks living with your mother isn't safe for you guys. She started noticing bruises on you kids and you guys would call her late at night telling her to go and pick you guys up." he paused for a second before continuing. "You guys are coming to live with me for a while. If things start to change then you guys can go back, but by the looks of it right now that is not going to happen any time soon. You guys are moving to Los Angeles!" After he said that tears started to swell in my eyes. I just got Ryan back. I just started school. "Thats going to be next semester considering you just started school." once he said that I felt a little better. At least I have 4 months to spend with all of my friends before I have to move to LA.

"Okay. I will tell the girls." I said with a monotone voice.

"No need. I wanted to come down and discuss it with you guys tonight. I will pick you up at around 6. Okay?"

"Alright. See you at 6." my voice cracked a bit at the end. I pressed the end button and threw my phone across the room, got off Ryan's lap, and went to get some water.

"Wait. Sav. What happened? Why did your dad call you?" I just drank my water not making eye contact with Ryan. I was trying really hard not to cry. I didn't want to tell him at all. It's better for him to think that I'm breaking up with him so it wouldn't be so hard to let him go. I was being so selfish at the time.

"You should go." I said that so quietly, I could barely hear myself.

"Sav, just tell me what happened." I shook my head, tears were welling up in my eyes again.

"Please, you are making this harder than it needs to be." I paused for a second and ran my hand through my hair.

"I don't think this is going to work." he looked puzzled so I continued. "I don't think we are going to work."

I watched as tears swelled up in his eyes as well. My heart cracked into a million pieces at the sight of that. "Savannah, please tell me what's wrong. I just got you back. Did I do anything wrong?" I walked towards him tears were now streaming down mine and his face.

"No. You didn't do anything. It's my fault."

"Oh, so now you're going to pull that 'It's not you. It's me.' crap?! You know what? Whatever. Don't tell me anything! I have tons of girls drooling after me!" he paused for a second, lost at words, as was I. The tears were coming quick just falling down my face and onto the floor carelessly. His face was still red from yelling his previous hurtful words.

"I'm so sorry." I let my head fall and I just stood there for the rest of the time being, whimpering as soft as I could.

"Save it, Savannah. I'm done trying to make this work." I grabbed onto his arm trying to stop him from leaving even though that was what I originally hoped he'd done. He was too strong, I felt him slip out of my grasp more and more as he walked away. It was then I had realized that one of the three people that I care about has just left me in this world, alone. I just stood there for a while letting all that has happened sink in. My knees started to shake and I started crying harder and harder. There was no one to stop it so, I slowly sat down on the floor with my back against the cabinets and put my head in my hands and cried... and cried... and cried.

2 HOURS LATER

The girls got home about an hour ago and we were now getting ready to have dinner with my dad. I changed into this beautiful beige top that my grandmother gave me and some white jeans. Izzy had dressed into her favorite mickey mouse tank top and favorite pair of skinny jeans that she rarely takes off. And Bree was wearing a shirt that exposed a little too much skin for my taste and some blue jeans that fit her physique well. I blew out a deep breath not wanting to go to this stupid dinner. I really didn't want to go. I'm still really upset about what happened with Ryan, but I had to put on a smile for the girls. Have you ever been hurt so bad that you can actually feel your heart crack? That is a pretty good idea about how I feel right now, but they can't know. Nobody can know...

My dad finally arrived and we all left to eat at Macaroni Grill. "Hey, Savannah." my dad said hugging me. He pulled away and moved on to Bree then Izzy. "So how are you guys?"

"We're good. How about you?" I answered for all three of us.

"I'm good. Sorry I didn't come down to see you guys. Work was really busy." I nodded my head implying that it was okay, but in reality it really wasn't. He was dressed in his usual work clothes which consisted of a dress shirt, nice slacks, and some Italian shoes. Typical considering the place he works.

We entered the parking lot of the restaurant and hopped out of the car. As I walked through the doors the Italian aroma filled my nostrils making my mouth water. "Table for four please." my dad said to the young waitress behind the front desk.

"Okay. Follow me, please." she grabbed the menus and walked to a table with four chairs. We all sat down one by one and looked at each other with awkward silence.

"So after winter vacation you guys will come and live with me." my dad said mostly to the girls since he already told me earlier. I cringed at the thought of what happened earlier today. I wish I could go back and fix everything between me and Ryan, but I knew that I couldn't do that.

"YAY!" Izzy said with enthusiasm.

"I'm glad someones happy." 'Well that makes one of us' I thought as I picked at my pasta.