The Unwanted Life

Edgar Allen Poe Or Some Shit

Tonight's New Year's eve and it's the last night here in Julian, and possibly the last night with my friends. On the 1st of January is when I take departure to Los Angeles. It doesn't seem fair that me and Cayden just got together after a long 3 months of us desiring for this day to come. The Universe just loves me that much. I really don't want to leave them. They're like my family now.

"Savannah, are you coming or not?" Alex asked peeking her head around the door of my bedroom.

"Huh?" I asked at first, but then remembered we were gonna go to a barbecue restaurant somewhere up the road. "Oh, right. Yeah, hold on. Let me just make sure I look okay." I walked over to the mirror and fiddled with my ponytail. "Alright, I'm ready. Leggo." I said jumping a little bit.

We got downstairs and everyone was dressed fairly nice. Cayden met me by the door and wrapped his arm around my shoulder. "You look muy bonita." he whispered in my ear making a shiver go down my spine. I looked down at my shoes and smiled. I looked up and replied to his compliment with a kiss on the cheek.

"Thanks, love." I looked at the place where I had kissed him and there was a lipstick mark. I giggled and licked my thumb to wipe it off.

"Savannah." Cayden wined while I stopped him to get the lipstick off better.

"Fine. I'm done." I giggled out.

"You're lucky you're really freaking adorable." he said while he wiped my spit off with his sleeve. I rolled my eyes and grabbed his hand bringing him over to James' car. Since Jaz and Dante got there first they got to pick the middle seats, so me and Cayden had to sit in the way back. Good thing it's only a couple miles up the road because I would have gotten so carsick.

We got back home from dinner and it was okay, but not something to go back to. It was about 10:30 so we had an hour and thirty minutes before the countdown to 2011. Some of us got our bathing suits on and went out to the Jacuzzi which was on the enclosed patio. Our group of people consisted of Me, Cayden, Alex, James, Dante, and Jaz.

"So are you guys, like, a thing now?" Alex asked me and Cayden with a smirk. I rolled my eyes playfully and let Cayden answer that one because I don't even know.

"Technically, but I want to actually take her out on a date before we tell the whole world that we're an item." he said with a slight smile. "But we both know how we feel about each other and that's enough for me." Cayden continued while looking at me with his popular smile that every girl in the school falls in love with. Wow, I am one lucky girl.. Kind of...

"Me too." I smiled back and planted a soft, passionate kiss on his lips.

"Aww." Alex squealed in her spot on James' lap. "Is there any awkwardness between you and Ryan? I mean you guys broke up like 4 days ago and you both already found someone new."

"No. I mean not with me. I don't know about him." I answered with a shrug. "Tatiana and Ryan deserve each other, and no one else." I nodded my head and sat on my hands. "Tatiana's a cold heartless bitch and Ryan is a selfish man whore. Their like the perfect match." I said with a quiet giggle.

"And what about you and Cayden?" Jaz jumped in. I looked at her questioningly wondering what she meant by that. "Do you think you guys are a perfect match?" she replied to my furrowed eyebrows.

"I do. What about you, babe?" I turned to my left and met Cayden's eyes while he just smiled widely.

"You have no idea. At first when I was dating Ryan he made me feel better." he looked down with a sad confused look. Then I heard Jaz cough my name out. I looked at her and she gave me an 'are- you- serious?' look. "Wait, you didn't let me finish." he looked back up, but the expression didn't leave his face. "He made me feel better, but something was still missing. I had no clue what it was. I thought it was just because of the stuff that is happening in my life right now. I thought that empty feeling would always be there because of what my mom took away from me. But I realized the day at the beach, when you told me you liked me for the first time, something sparked inside of me that made me feel like everything with me and Ryan was wrong and I still, again, couldn't figure out was wrong. Then, the day Ryan cheated on me with Tatiana came around, and when I found out, I wasn't that upset. I actually felt kind of.. glad that he did. And then..." I closed my eyes thinking of that day with a smile on my face. "Then we kissed for the first time, and everything felt completely right. Like I was on a cloud and it was just me and you and no one else. You filled that emptiness with love and lust and passion." I stopped talking and looked around at the group of people that were sitting around the jacuzzi.

"Damn, girl. You're like Edgar Allen Poe, or some shit." Dante said with his arms wrapped around Jaz's waist.

"How do you even know who that is?" Jaz turned around and asked him with one eyebrow raised. "I asked you the other day if you knew who Picasso was and you thought it was a type of cheese." everyone started laughing while Jazmine just turned around and shook her head confirming that it really did happen.

"Ewww. I'm getting wrinkly. See ya losers." Alex said getting out of the water.

"Yeah, I'm gonna get out too." I paused and looked at Cayden. "Are you coming?" he nodded his head and we left Jaz and Dante alone in the hot tub. I followed Cayden up the stairs with a sad smile. 'One more day' I thought. He didn't know yet... I was scared. With one sad look I would die.

Next thing I knew, we were in the bedroom. "Alright, I'm gonna go get dressed." I said the expression still printed on my face.

"Okay, me too." I nodded my head and ran to the bathroom with my previous clothes from dinner inside my hand. How am I supposed to tell him this? We just got together after several months of longing stares and restraining ourselves from being together while with other people. I opened the door and shut off the light. 'Well, here goes nothing.'

"Cayden, we need to talk." I sat down on the couch and patted the spot next to me.

"What's wrong, babe?" he sat down next to me and looked into my eyes with a confused look. Right when I looked into his eyes, mine started to water and I was then bawling my eyes out.

"I'm so sorry." I dropped my head in my hands as the tears slid down my arm. I felt him wrap his arms around me. "I'm scared. I like you so much! I can't- I can't-." I got up and paced the room. He followed my actions and gripped my arms pulling me close to his face.

"You can't what?" I could tell he was getting kind of frustrated that I wouldn't just spit it out, but it's so hard to say.

"I can't say goodbye to you." I finally blurted out making my arms go limp.

"Why would you need to say goodbye?"

"My mom doesn't want us anymore! We're mistakes in her horrible life! She only has us there to take her anger out on." I calmed down and took a deep breath. "My dad is taking us to live with him." he looked at the ground and sat back down on the couch.

"When?"

"You're gonna hate me." he raised his eyebrows and jumped up.

"Just tell me already!" I flinched at his behavior, but I still decided to answer him.

"Okay! I'm leaving tomorrow!" I said flailing my arms in anger. "When we get back to Chula Vista, my dad would be waiting for me at my house. I will be gone before night time." I closed my eyes trying to stop the tears from flowing, but it wouldn't.

"Sav, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell at you, it's just.. I just got the girl of my dreams and she's now being taken away from me. I don't want you to leave." I looked at him with sad eyes and thought 'I don't want to go through this again.'

"I don't want to leave either, but my dad is making me." he nodded his head slowly. "Can you promise me one thing?"

"Anything."

"Promise me that you won't forget me. And when I come back..." I paused for a second, "If I come back, please try to talk to me again. We're more than what ever we are now. You're still my best friend, Cay." I put my pinkie finger up hoping he would do his part and wrap his around it. And he did just that.

"Of course, I promise you." he wrapped his strong arms around my fragile body and didn't let go. And I didn't want him to...