Rebel Girl

39} Burn Baby, Burn

© Amber Kalkes 2015

Song: "Real World" By Matchbox 20

Chapter Thirty-Nine: Burn Baby, Burn

"What the...no!" I yell, throwing my hands in the air. As the credits roll on the screen for the season finale I feel my anger spike. How could they end it like that? He was about to say it back and then the transmission was cut short! He was right there! Right freaking there! Why couldn't he just be allowed to tell her he loved her! It just isn't fair!

I can feel Lou's amused eyes on me as I pout on my end of the couch, "You okay there?"

"No."

"There's another season to watch. Do you want to watch it?"

"I don't know." I mumble sullenly, "I don't know if I'm emotionally prepared for that."

"You know it's just a show right?"

"It's not just a show," I snap, glaring at him before going into my original pouty position, "It's a way of life."

He arches a dark brow at me, "I'm starting to think getting you hooked on Netflix was a bad idea."

"Well it's too late to go back now."

"So..." Lou trails, "Did you think about what I asked about earlier."

I keep my eyes solely on the TV as I wait for the next season's episode to load, "No."

Out of the corner of my eye I see him drop his head and groan. He runs a hand through his hair as he lifts his head to ask, "Why not?"

"Because I'm not going," I tell him simply.

"You would be if you answered yes."

"But I don't want to go."

Lou scratches at the side of his head, clearly irritated, "And why was that again?"

"I just don't want to go."

"That's a bullshit answer and you know it."

"I'm not exactly the type to go to something like that."

"No such thing as a 'type' it's all inclusive. That's the point of it."

I shift in my seat but continue not looking at him, "I'd feel uncomfortable."

"I'd go with you." He counters, "And Sutton would be there. So would Carla and Tommy."

"You sure you want to lower yourself to hanging out with us nerdy high schoolers?" I ask with an arched brow.

Lou grins at me, "Honey, I'd lower myself to just about anything for you."

My stomach flutters but I roll my eyes at his cheesy line, "I'll keep that in mind."

He laughs, "Please do."

I sigh heavily and turn to face Lou full on. I don't want to hurt his feelings and tell him that I don't want to go with him because that's not really the issue. The issue, as usual, has nothing to do with him. I really just can't mentally put myself in that setting. It's like throwing a frog in a room full of doves. I'm just going to stand out amongst the hoard.

"Emerson, baby, it's just prom."

Grabbing one of the couch pillows I smother myself with it as I sink into the couch further. Even the word seems to sting my ears. I can't do it. I just can't do it. It's just seems so above me that I can't quite fathom what I would do there. I where a fancy dress and what? Hang out? Dance? I can't dance. He knows it better than anyone that I can't dance!