Shadows of Yesterday

Chapter 20: Idiot Hopefuls Have Annoyingly Sharp Eyes

Waiting for Liam to knock on my front door was torture of the worst kind. I couldn't get Declan out of my mind, no matter how much I tried. The sight of his face--bitter, angry, and so incredibly tired--confessing to me that he'd been in therapy for years without me knowing, was playing on a loop in my head. I couldn't stop wishing that I'd snatched that whiskey bottle from his hands when I had the chance.

It's what a good sister would have done. But then again, when had I ever been one of those?

Currently, I was pacing around my living room floor, trying to force my mind to shut up. I was worried that as soon as Liam saw my face, he would know something was wrong. He already knew that one member of my family was dead and another was more alcohol than person--I didn't need him finding out that it might be my fault that said alcoholic had to keep his problems under lock and key.

Just be normal, I thought, channel your inner Ben.

Liam's knock broke the tense silence like a gunshot, and I flinched, abruptly coming to a stop in the middle of the carpet. My heart was pounding so loud I was afraid he could hear it from outside on the porch. I couldn't make my body move.

Another knock, and my feet moved to the door almost of their own accord. Be normal. Be normal. Be normal be normal be normal be--

I yanked open the door. "Hey! What are you doing here?"

What was that?!

Thankfully, Liam took my idiotic question in stride. He smiled playfully and leaned against the doorframe, a teasing glint in his eyes. "Don't tell me you forgot about me already. We were just texting half an hour ago."

I forced a laugh that probably sounded faker than American cheese and walked out the front door, closing it behind me harder than necessary. 

I shoved my hands in my pockets. My smile was supposed to be teasing, but it probably looked more like a grimace. "Forget about you? I wish."

"I'm hurt, truly," he quipped, following me down the stairs and onto the sidewalk. "Don't think I didn't see that, by the way."

Crap.

My stomach dropped. He noticed. Of course he noticed. He was Liam Brown; what did I expect?

I sped up my pace, pulling slightly in front of him so that he couldn't see my face. "What do you mean?"

No way was I admitting anything that easily.

Liam easily matched my walking speed, much to my chagrin. "The way you're pretending to be fine, even though something clearly happened."

"Truth or Truth?"

He looked like he wanted to press the issue and not let me change the subject, but I was grateful when he left it alone. "Truth," he responded with narrowed eyes.

"What do you want to go to do after you graduate?"

He didn't even have to think before he replied. "I want to go to school to be a teacher."

I stopped walking. "Wait, what?" That wasn't what I expected him to say.

He stopped beside me, amusement tugging at the corners of his smile. "Why is that so surprising?"

"No reason, I've just never heard someone admit they want to be homeless before." 

The joke was out of my mouth before I could stop it, and I immediately regretted it. In my mind, invisible threads snatched the words from the air before they could reach Liam's ears, protecting me from my own mean-spirited sense of humor. Alas, I was no magician, and the boy in front of me was divinely blessed with the eyes and ears of a hawk, so the only thing I could actually do was slap my hand over my mouth with wide eyes as soon as the joke was made.