Finding Love Series: When Love Gets Hard (Book 3) #TheWattys2017

Thinking About It All (Chapter. 12)

*Wes *

I don't know how we got to this. Beth and I used to be perfect. Now I'm questioning everything. When people say love is hard they aren't lying. I remember when Beth and I were great and so were April and Leo. Now we aren't power couples anymore. We might not be couples at all. I love Beth so much, I can't imagine my life without her. But the fact that she doesn't want to be with her family hurts me more than I'll ever admit to anyone. I get life gets hard. Especially with two kids, a husband, a career, and trying to maintain a life. But you don't leave everyday. I feel like she is trying to get away from me. I want to be with her every second not without her. So this hurts a lot. I don't know what to do. Leo will make fun of me if I say all of this because he doesn't show his feelings. Not to mention he is going through so much. I mean he's grieving one of his sons while the other one is missing and he's separated from April. That's pretty rough and he still goes to work each day. So I won't burden him with my issues. April kind of has the right idea though. She went on a vacation to get away and just think. You know to figure things out. It could be a good idea.

*April*

I regret taking Lance. I do. But Leo wouldn't let me see him and wouldn't work with me. I just didn't think things through. Now I mean I can't keep him forever. I don't know what will happen when I bring him back. I know Leo will take him the rest of the way away from me. Fuck.

*Beth*

I can't believe Wes said he couldn't look at me. Or that he needed time away from me. I love him so much. I honestly don't know what is going through my mind. I don't know what makes me act this way. I love Wes and I love the kids. But sometimes it just gets to be to much. I don't even know.

*Leo*

I'm stressing so much right now. I barely sleep. But I somehow manage to make it through my work days. I just lost Lane and now I have no idea where Lance is. I can't get in touch with April to tell her that he's missing. She's on some fucking vacation to clear her head. I don't even know if I want to still be with her. I am questioning everything at this point. Should I just be alone? Will I find Lance? I just don't know anymore. I really don't. Everything used to be so great. I don't know what happened to make it all come crashing down. Things are broken now. I don't know if they can ever be fixed. I don't know if I want them to ever be fixed.