Fading Out

Chapter 18

Nick's POV

"Yes. I fear it is." I answer her with just enough sadness so that none of my hurt leaks out from within. The way her face softens into that tender expression tells me that she knows, though.

"But what you ask me to give up..." she starts but doesn't finish. She doesn't have to. It can end in so many ways and I have a very good idea that she means them all.

"We've been over this, Daisy. If you want to be free, you need to let go of what once was. If you don't let go of the Samuel that once was your potential true love, you cannot hope to reunite with him in a different life and time." It is surprising to feel such a huge amount of heartache on speaking true love and someone else's name in the same sentence to her. So, to console myself more than her, I add, "If you can't finish this journey, how will we meet again in a new place and time?"

"You are a very special man, Nick Demming Peters." She adds in a whisper that is laced with emotions I can't decipher. I just know that I'm happy to have them. "If we met when I was alive, if we had met in my time, I would have run from the wedding aisle from George, from even Samuel perhaps, to be with you." Could she be any more special? She understood what I was trying to hide. "You would be worth sacrificing everything."

Just like she did, it isn't hard for me to understand the sadness of her words either. "No one will ever steal what is yours now. There won't be another for me, Daisy. No one worth sacrificing everything for me." The thought of a lonely existence is painful but not as much as of living a lie of loving someone else.

Her eyes widen a fraction as if something just occurred to her but I can't see much on her face in the dark night that's nearly over. I want to ask her but I don't, letting her have a few secrets. "It's been a long night, no?"

"The longest." The wistful smile is more than enough of a hint of the unspoken.

"And the best that has ever been." I add and she doesn't even need to reply. We both know it is the truth.

"But the night now draws to a close." I sadly note and this time, her nod is slower, as if showing her hesitation in accepting this fact. "And though it has been an unforgettable adventure, it is time to prepare to return to the world of the living."

"And to say goodbye." She repeats and I am overwhelmed by the desire to just walk away from all this. As if there's a secret way to be together and not have to ever make this kind of decision. But there isn't. After what I have seen of her, I'm not sure she will ever be this strong to be able to try breaking free of this sentence. The way she looks, like she is holding herself back, is more than enough of an indicator that she too is resisting the urge.

It has been a long night and a lot has been said and done. But still, I feel like there is a huge variety of things we can try. A lifetime worth of words, I note mentally. I lose myself in thoughts so deep that she almost shouts to get my attention. "Yes?"

"I was wondering..." She hesitates for some unknown reason before continuing. "Would you like a tour of my house?" The surprise overcomes any other emotion that might appear and I can almost feel her preparing to back track. So I quickly start nodding.

"Yes. Absolutely yes." I speak way too eagerly and though tinted with sadness, her smile at my response is still blinding.

"Come on then." With those words, she leads me back to the entrance. If there's one thing that I would really like to share, the way we came down would be it. We flew down, like really flew down from the roof and landed on the entrance. Her presence was the only thing that kept me grounded. It had no effect on keeping my forgotten accomplice in check of his behaviour though.