Josh's Pov
I was the happiest I could be. I still had a lingering anxiety that almost made me hyperventilate around people.. but, it seemed to fade when I was with Tyler.
-I had to leave Tyler's place early that night to relive some stress..
driving
home
voices inside my head
I didn't like myself..
I didn't understand how Tyler could like me.. if he really does.
I needed to take pills..
I know I was upset with Tyler when he did but- I was going to be okay once I took them
bathroom
cabinet
bottle
swallowing
I liked feeling numb.
no emotions.
less hatred.
less voices.
no feelings.
I was different this time but I didn't need anyone's help.
I layer on the floor looking at the ceiling.
thoughts of Tyler raced my mind.
I adore his cute little smile
the way his eyes lit up
his little poems
he never let me read any, but I thought it was cute.
his hot hair
his amazing personality
his caring thoughts
I wanted it to be official one day I wanted him to be mine.
my boyfriend, Tyler Joseph.
wow.
by the Tim they wore off,
I heard a knock at the bathroom door.
still laying on the floor,
"Josh? there's somebody at the door for you.."
"ok gimme a second."
I wasn't dressed to see anyone.. I was shirtless with shorts so I slipped on my vans, jeans and a jacket.
shit the zippers broken.
oh well.
I went down the stairs and opens the door to see..
"Tyler?"
"Josh can you come outside I need you."
"yeah what's up? is something wrong."
I replied, worried that he needed something from me or that he would tell me that he didn't like me.
"Josh? are you alright?"
I started breathing uneven, I was so scared, so cold.
"Josh?"
he tried to grab my arm
I didn't need anyone to calm my anxiety I CAN HANDLE IT MYSELF.
"I'M FINE TYLER."
I practically yelled and swatted him off
he turned around, covering his face
"shit Josh I was just trying to help.."
I heard a sniffle
shit I didn't mean to was he crying?
God I'm a terrible person
I managed to even screw this up.
"Tyler I-I'm sorry I didn't mean to."
"whatever Josh. get in the car."
"okay..."
what the hell is happening
he started the car, pulling out of the driveway.
"Tyler where are we-"
"shhh" he said while driving covering my mouth for a second
hot
"I'm taking you on a ride."
um what
"where to?"
"my pants" he smirked.
"wha"
"God Josh I was kidding relax."
my breathing uneven
"oh o-okay."
he laughed
"I'm taking you somewhere special.
we drove along to wherever but I don't care. I was with Tyler. we listened to blink 182 singing along together. I can't really sing but I enjoyed it with him and God was his voice beautiful. I just loved everything about it.
"what? the bridge?"
I had seen this place too many times
Tyler remained silent stopping the car
"why are we here."
"just grab my hand Josh."
we intertwined our fingers, eyes set on each other he pulled me next to him
"this is where I realized something Josh."
"this is where I realized you were special to me. and that I had to have you."
"Josh will you be my boyfriend?"
holy shit
I stayed silent wrapping my arms around Tyler's waist lifting him
off the ground holding him, connecting our lips.
I pulled away, still holding on to him. his eyes wide and alive.
"Yes Tyler Joseph, I'd love to be your boyfriend."
I swear his smile could light up the world.
-end-
a/n: I hope you enjoyed that Joshler fluff!
I've spent a lot of hours tonight watching Dan and Phil . it's great.
Kat out *stalks Josh Dun*
