Styles, Harry Styles. (#Wattys2015)

Guardian Angel

"Harry...you shouldn't be here." I repeat for the third time, still completely in shock. 

Tears are streaming down my face and I instantly get a flashback to the first time he saw me. I remember how he ran away and everything that happened after that. 

I don't say a word, but I find my eyes fixed on his, unable to utter any more sounds.

He is still standing there, frozen. Part of me wants to say something, and the other part of me wants to run up to him and hug him tight. But, I don't do any of that. I turn away and look out the window instead, so that he doesn't see the tears in my eyes.

"How did you find me...I told you I was going to be at my dad's." I ask silently, still in shock. 

He still doesn't say anything, but he finally walks over to me and hugs me from behind.

"Jules...please don't ever scare me like that." That's it. That's all he says. 

He is still hugging me and I start to feel awkward. It's a long hug and we both remain in complete silence, and it shouldn't feel weird or anything like that, but it does. It feels weird and it feels awkward, because I cannot say anything. I don't feel like saying anything.

It's only Harry, it shouldn't feel weird. I remind myself and finally I sigh loudly.

"Jules. Come with me, let's go home." He says and grabs my hand tightly, refusing to let go.

"No, Harry...you go." 

"I'm not letting go Jules. Come on." He says, sounding confident, but I can feel the sadness in his voice.

It makes me feel sad. I hate to see him like this. But, I can't move. Something at the back of my mind is stopping me from moving, or taking a step.

"Okay. Fine, you want to stay here? Then so be it."

I can't believe he just gave up on me like that. This is not the Harry that I know.

"But, you can't stop me from stopping here too. Whenever you're ready, then we'll go."

"There's nothing here Harry. No food, no electronic devices, nothing."

It's true. All I have on me is my phone, and all of my personal belongings is still at Harry's. So, there's barely anything here. Food. Oh yeah food. I'm hungry. But, yeah, there's no food here either. My mom hates keeping extra food in the pantry and such. She says she prefers to buy things "fresh", even though I tell her that it doesn't really make a difference, since the can or whatever you always buy has been on the shelf in the store for probably a long time anyway.

"It's all good, we'll figure something out. I'm sure we won't be bored. Well, you'd have less things to do if I wasn't around."

Damn it. Why does he have to be like that. It makes me happy that he's like that, but I hate that he's like that, because it just reminds me that I'm always wrong, and he's always right.

"So what do you say we take a nap or something? Since you don't intend on getting out of here anytime soon anyway and besides, that will make time go by faster."

I'd fancy a nap right now, but no. I think I'll pass.

"Or...if you want to talk about it, let me know how it went at your dad's place."

Right, my dad's place. That's why I came home, isn't it? Because I wanted it to be over. I don't want to have to take care of my step-siblings paperworks. It's a long process and for now, I'm supposed to watch over them, until everything is all set. That's why I ran away, again. Like I did at the cottage. Then, I thought I fixed my mess, after today, but I'm wrong. I just realized. There's more I have to do.

"Harry...I need to borrow your mom's car right now."

"Why...? Are you going to drive yourself off a cliff?"

Thanks for the idea Harry. 

"No, there's something I need to do. I need to go back to my dad's."

"Why...?"

Harry, why do I need to get through a series of questions right now? Please, just let me be.

"Harry, just please. There's something I need to do."

"Whatever it is, I'm coming with." He says.

I realize that he's still holding my hand, once I feel his hand tighten.

"Don't you trust me?" I say.

"I just want to make sure that everything's okay...and I'm scared, I don't know what's going on. Why do you think I ran here? For you. I'm sick worried about you and all you care to ask is whether or not I trust you? Of course I trust you, but I just want to help."

"You've helped me enough." I say and I can't believe that I even dared say those words to Harry. How could I be so salty and how could I even do that when he's been nothing but a sweetheart to me. He stayed by me side, despite the fact that I've been annoying and I've had my bad days. 

"Jules. I'm coming with you, whether you like it or not. I can't let you do this alone anymore. You scared the hell out of me and I don't want that to happen again. Unless, well...you want me to have a heart attack or something."

I find myself hugging Harry. I'm sobbing on his shoulders. 

"How do you do it? HOW? You've got your own problems and yet you want to listen to all of mine. You care so much about school and yet you skip so much of it, just to spend time with me. You've been nothing but good to me and I haven't done my part. I've been the opposite. And even after all of that, how could you still treat me this way? Why?"

"Julie, you listen to me. I love you all right? And they say that actions speak louder than words, but I don't exactly believe that - but it sort of reflects in my actions. That's how I express my love for you. You may be different, but it's okay. You have your unique ways of expressing your love for me. I understand you and it's okay if you may not be exactly like me; that's what keeps us together."

I don't say a word and we're stuck in a long silence, which I decide to break. I decide to say his words, "Styles, Harry Styles" and he smiles. The first smile on his face since he came here. I'm glad. 

And with that, he gets up and tells me to follow him. He still holds my hand tight and we walk back to his house. He gets his mother's keys from her and he drives me to my father's.

Once we park in the driveway, I can almost feel the flashbacks coming back, but as I finally let his hands go to hold my head tight, as if to avoid those flashbacks, Harry gives me a hug.

"It's okay. I'm right here."