Shauna Diaries

An Unexpected Visitor

I cried all the way home. Seeing Ray brought back so many feelings that I thought were gone. Writing him was one thing, but seeing him was something I thought I wouldn't have to do for years.
When I got home I got my mail from the doorman and got on the elevator. With me being pregnant I hated riding elevators, I didn't like how it made my body feel. As I looked through my mail I thought about the night me and Ray went to Vegas and he got us a pent house suit. On the ride to the hotel me and Ray couldn't keep our hands off each other, it got so bad that when we made it to the elevator my dress was up, his pants were down, and we was fucking as we went up each floor. The glass in the elevator started to fog and the deeper he went inside of me, the deeper I fell in love with him at that moment.
As I walked down the hall I saw a man standing in the middle of the hall. He wasn't in front of anyone's door, he seemed to just be waiting on someone. He stood about 6'2, he was dark brown with long dread locks. I couldn't see his face because his back was turned to me, but one thing I knew for certain was that he didn't belong here. I kept walking until I got to my door, when I got there I started to look for my key on my keychain. As I looked for my key I noticed the man had an envelope in his hands and he was looking directly at me. Now that I was closer I could see his face and I knew something was wrong with him, he was crying.

"Umm, excuse me sir, can I help you? I've never seen you around here before, and I know all of the tenants on this floor so all you have to do is tell me a name and I can point you in the right direction." I said walking over to him.

"Yes please, I'm looking for a woman named Shauna. I don't know her last name." He said wiping his tears.

As he talked I realized he was gay. He had a very high pitched voice and he kept flipping his hair after each word he spoke. Maybe there was a misunderstanding, because I know he should not know me.

"I'm Shauna, I've had a long day so please come in so we can talk." I said leading him to my door. I put my key in the lock, unlocked the door, and welcomed him in.

Once we got into the house I gave him a soda and sat on the couch next to him.

"I shop at your store all of the time, it's the best in the city." He said taking a sip of his soda.

"Thank you so much! I've worked so hard on my store, and soon I will be opening another one." I said getting excited just talking about it.

"When will it be open? My friends hate having to go all the way across town just to get a few of your products."

"After I have my baby, I'm almost three months."

"You're pregnant?" He said seeming shocked.

"Yes, I haven't started showing yet so I see why this could be a surprise." I said laughing at his reaction.

"I have to go. I'm sorry for wasting your time, but this was a mistake." He said standing up and walking towards the door.

"Wait! Why were you crying in the hallway? And what's in that envelope? I know you didn't find me for nothing."

"It's about Lee."

"Lee? You must be a new client of his? He left a folder where you can leave requests or questions if you have any." I said walking towards the table where the folder was.

"No I'm not a client of his, he was suppose to be my man."

"What do you mean man? Man as in spouse? As in lover? As in BOYFRIEND?!" I said getting sick to my stomach.

"Yes, I'm suppose to meet him in Mexico tomorrow morning, but a close friend of mine saw you two together yesterday so I never bought the ticket with the money he gave me."

"So you're telling me Lee is GAY? I need to sit down I'm starting to feel sick." I said taking my seat back on the couch.

"Yes he's gay and he said he wasn't ashamed of it, but how can that be when he got you pregnant? I can't believe your pregnant, I always thought I would be the one to carry his child."

"No offense, but how the hell can you get pregnant? You a man, that's impossible!"

"That's not the point! You're pregnant and he was suppose to be with me! We were going to get married but he fucked you!"

"Look bitch you wanna fight or some? I'm feeling like you got animosity towards me when you need to be mad at him! He did this not me! I could be mad like you but what would that solve? He still did it, I'm still pregnant, and your feelings are still hurt!"

He sat next to me and began to cry. I saw so much pain in his eyes, like each tear was a piece of his broken heart.

"I never even told you my name." He said laughing.

"See, there you go, laughter is good." I said patting his back.

"I'm Lance, it's nice to meet you Shauna."

"It's nice to meet you too, but what are we going to do about Lee?" I said sounding serious.

That night me and Lance stayed up all night watching movies, laughing, and crying. He even rubbed my aching feet as we sat on my couch eating ice cream. I wanted to be mad at him, shit I wanted to hate him, but I couldn't bring myself to that point. He was just like me when I found out Ray got Shanterrica pregnant. I was hurt, angry, and confused. I couldn't blame him for wanting to meet me and demand answers, shit I did the exact same thing.
Lance left around 5 o'clock that morning, I walked him to the elevator and gave him a nice big hug before he left. When I got back I was tired and ready to take a hot shower.
I turned my tv off and put my food back in the pantry. Before I walked into my room I saw the envelope that Lance had, he must have forgotten it. I opened the envelope and read the sheet of paper.

Lance is HIV positive....