Don't Leave Me

Chapter 38

B's POV
J was asleep for a long time it was so scary. Now she is in Chase's mom's car going to his house. I'm so glad she is okay. Its all mine and Trey's fault she got hurt. She was so mad and stressed when she saw the fire...she passed out. She fell into the fire and hit her head on the sharp counter. I was so angry and scared when it happened. It was Trey's fault that we weren't paying attention. If I just woulda stopped being a hormonal teenager for five minutes...she almost died- it would have never happened. I have to start paying attention. I know what I have to do. I don't want to. I have to. Ugh. I just wish there was some other way. I sighed at the this thought. Ugh. I sigh again. I'm on the bus right now...alone. I swear the guy staring at me thinks I'm depressed. Just look at me. I'm a wreck. I haven't slept in four days. Its Saturday. I haven't slept since Tuesday. I couldn't sleep with the guilt. Its my fault that it happened. Her fucking house is destroyed. She lives alone. She was fucking emancipated. Those people won't trust her anymore. They won't let her live alone anymore. Its my fault. I started crying now. If I would have thought for a minute. If I would have told Trey to pay attention to the food. Ugh. All she has is a backpack. No clothes. Just a bra, underwear, and whatever else she carries in her backpack. Which is probably all her personal stuff. Deoderant, perfume, cologne (yes she wears cologne), ChapStick, hair ties, brush, bobby pins, charger, headphones, phone, wallet. That's all she has left. Its all my fault. Yup, I know what I have to do. I start to cry harder. My mascara running down my face. I look like a girl who just got cheated on in a cliché movie. Ugh. Life sucks. Who am I to say that? Jade just woke up from a concussion after four fucking days. Her house is burnt down. She has no family. She was fucking emancipated. She won't be able to get to live alone anymore. She will have to go to a group home. Its all my fault. I have to live with this guilt. I can't kill myself because Jade will think that its her fault. Its not. I can't let her loose anyone else. Her mom died in a car accident along with all her sibblings. She finally found her dad and he treated her like shit.

>>"I don't have any children." He simply said with no emotion in his tone. I have never seen her more angry or sad than I did that day.

"You're my dad. Mom was killed. So was everyone else. You're all I have. Dad. Please." she begged.

"I don't have any children. Sorry kid." He said in sympathy. You could tell by the look in the eyes he knew that this is his daughter but I didn't say anything... Jade was hurt enough for one day. She would be able to take it.

"You are my dad. I have missed you for seven fucking years. You act like you don't know me. You left. Mom was pregnant with your daughter. She was great by the way. Her name was Rose. She was beautiful. Was. She's dead now. The two other kids you had." She paused. "Todd. Marie. They didn't even remember you.I had two other siblings that weren't even your kids. Sophia and Christopher. I use to think every once in a while, 'I wonder what it would be like to have a dad. I mean I have a dad but one that is there. One to scold me for thinking about dating. To pick me up and swing me over his shoulders. Embarrass me in front of everyone. A dad that loves me.' That would really be nice. I just want to be like every other 'daddy's girl' like Braedon here." She pointed to me. "Her dad loves her. I mean he tries to buy her love some times." She laughed bitterly. "I want a dad who is there. I just want a dad. I don't care if he ignores me twenty four seven. I wouldn't mind if all he did was sit on the couch and watch football and eat cheese balls and pork skins all damb day. I wouldn't mind if her forgot me at a store once in a while. As long as he doesn't beat me I'm cool. I just want to have a flesh in blood, real fucking dad. I just want my dad again. I want my dad. I loved my dad. I miss him so much. I know you're my dad by your face and voice but...your heart its gone. I want you to be my dad again. I want you to put me on your back again. I want you to sit on my legs when I'm laying down just to bugg me. I want to listen to your old, awesome music on the radio with you again. I can't remember what station it was we use to listen to. I want you to tell me stories again. I wanna see your tie dye rainbow shirts every morning. I wanna see your bright eyes when I come home from school everyday. By the way I'm about to start eighth grade. I wanna see you eat that disgusting rasin bran cereal. I want to jump on your back when you least expect it. I want you to use my head as an arm rest like you use to. I want to go camping with you again at the American river and go crawdading again. I want you to take me ice skating like you promised all those years ago. I miss you dad." She started full on crying for like ten minutes. It hurt seeing her like that. I saw a single tear on his face. I know he is her real dad. He whiped it away. When she finished crying he spoke.

"I know you must love your father a lot young lady. He loves you too I know that for a fact. I am not your father. I'm sorry you lost your family and I hope you find your father. " he hugged her. If he's not her father and in fact a complete stranger he should not have hugged her. I know that was her father because I saw the tears roll down his face when he was hugging her. He really does love her. Why couldn't he just tell her that he was in fact her dad?

"I found you already dad." He pulled out of the hug and look at her. His face went emotionless again.

"Sorry kid you have the wrong guy. Now beat it." His voice was cold.

She ran and cried so much.

"Sir, I know you are in fact Todd Jordan. I can see you love her very much. Why do you not tell her you are her father? She loves you so much and misses you. Why do you have to be cold and heartless to your own daughter? Your flesh and blood. Especially after her mother just died. Along with three of your other children."

"Look kid. I don't have any children. I give my condolences but I don't have anything else to give." I could tell he was fighting back tears.

"Just know you broke your daughter's heart before any boy could. Think about that." I saw the tears come pouring out of his eyes as I ran after Jade. What a great father. Not.

Author's Note
Anything in >><< is either a flash back or a dream or whatever. That was a flash back. I thought I should explain what an emancipation is. When someone is emancipated they are signed off by their parent of guardian to live alone. When someone is emancipated they must have some sort of financial aid. Job, inheritance, stuff like that. So yea I was just using this chapter to give a little peak at Jade's past life. I'm sorry if you were waiting for an update. I never really have my phone. So yea I write in my free time or when I have my phone. I usually don't have ideas for the chapters but yea...here's this one. It took me like an hour and a half to write this. I cried while writing this. Its very intense. I hope you like it. Sorry if you cried too. Vote if you want and please comment and tell me how you like my book and what to improve. Don't hate but I like constructive criticism. So yea...this chapters done. Peace out✌