Perspectives

7. Hero

I sat at home wondering what was wrong with me. My feelings for Nahuel were dimming so that the were only small crush feelings. I barely liked him at all. I turned out my lights and turned on the christmas lights that framed my window. They lit the room with a dim glow and made the window's glass sparkle. I looked around my room and examined all the features. The room still smelled slightly of paint even though the walls were painted so long ago. The ceiling a clean white to match the carpet, the walls a dusty pink. My dresser stretched all along the back wall and was shoved full of clothes, papers, and my photography paraphernalia. There was a mirror on top of the dresser, and my desk was on the front wall near the door of my room.  My bed was in the corner against the back wall and stretching out under my window that was framed with lights.  My acoustic guitar was leaned up against the wall and my electric sat on top of the amp in the corner.  The floor was littered with books and notebooks and a pens.  

I walked over to the wall and picked up my guitar.  I sat on the floor and began to pluck at some notes.  I turned music on and played along.  A melody filled the room.  All Fridays ended up being quite close to the same.  I always ended up in my room all alone.  I was rarely allowed to go out and I mostly sat and watched TV or wrote.  I was teaching myself to play the guitar.  Even though she had the money, paying for lessons wasn't.  

The song finished and I walked over to the computer to listen to some more music.  As I began to type a new song into itunes, my phone vibrated.  I grabbed it to see a new message from Claire.  She was planning on telling drew how she felt, so she was probably telling me how that went.  I opened the message.

It's all over was all it said.  Drew had broken up with Claire.  Did he know how much she liked him? Oh no.  Claire wasn't going to be okay.  What would people say at school?  Oh no.

I spent the rest of the weekend thinking about Claire.  We had a few late night conversations in which I gave her my piece of mind.  I told her Drew wasn't worth it and that she shouldn't feel upset.  naturally, she didn't believe me.  

On Sunday night, I was playing along to a song on youtube.  I put my guitar down for a moment and my mother came in.

"Oh, Hero," she said, "I thought you were playing along.  Oh, well, maybe someday you'll play that good."

"No, Mom," I began to explain, but didn't finish as her head disappeared out the door.  

i turned and through my window, I saw a flash of reddish hair whip across my window.  Was there a face in my window?  I ran over and opened my window.  I leaned my head out and looked around.  Nothing.  I pulled my head back inside and closed the window.  

It was nothing....

It was nothing.....

I kept telling myself that, but I still couldn't sleep.