I could've taken a taxi. As I walked down the sidewalk I realized that more people could recognize me again. Why didn't I take a taxi?
After several minutes of uninterrupted peace and quiet, I stopped keeping my guard up.
My bag hanged from one shoulder and I clutched the strap with both hands, keeping my eyes down on the floor. I noted all the stains of dirt on the concrete as I tried to think of something to focus on.
Usually my mind was crammed with dozens of thoughts and emotions, theories and plans, but this time I had nothing. There was nothing to think of, not anymore.
For weeks Thomas knew where I was, but I couldn't get my mind around the question as to why he never came to see me, as to why he sent Jason.
Then a thought buzzed and pierced into my ear; Michael. I quickly spun around in the direction I came from.
A body slams into mine and I find my face muffled into someone's chest.
"I'm sorry," I apologize quietly, not realizing how more uneasy I felt while talking.
"I'm the one who should be sorry, love."
My heart dramatically slowed down when a familiar accented voice gently sank into my ears and reached down to my heart, kicking it back into a marathon.
I shakily moved my focus towards the man face, curiosity whether I was hearing things and going crazy, or if my ears were actually correct.
A quiet breath pocketed into my lungs and they remained still, unable to breath at the sight.
"Thomas..." The word came out soft and airy, as if my heart was numbed to say it and my mind was unaccustomed to it.
"Y/n... " His voice sounded as weak as mine. He sounded like he'd missed saying my name and being able to get a response.
My grip tightened on my bag as I stared up at his face. He was still as handsome as ever, his gentle facial features seemingly aged out and tired. I noticed that his hair was a dark brown now, which reminded me of his role in the movie Nowhere Boy. I always thought he looked cute like that.
"What are you... What are you doing here?" I pulled the words out of my mouth, my mind and heart ripping away from each other in debate. They couldn't come to an agreement on how to react. I stood there expressionless, almost blanked out and shocked.
I was never prepared for this.
"I came to see you," he responds in a quiet and pleading voice, hinting that he was expecting me to run away again. He was afraid.
The knot in my throat swelled up and made it hard to talk, jumbling my thoughts together. "You-"
"Y/n!" A voice bursts behind me. "I've been looking for you! Where the hell have you been?"
I turned my head to track Michael running down towards me. He steps besides me, taking in short, deep breaths.
He finally notices Thomas and his eyebrow curved up in confusion. "And who the hell is this guy?"
Something tiny clicked in my chest and I was finally able to respond in a way that seemed normal nowadays; angry.
"You!!" I accused suddenly which causes Michael to take a slight step back in surprise.
"Uh, yes?" He choked out in confusion.
"You knew!!! You were a part of this plan from the beginning weren't you?!" I screamed, balling my fists together.
"Hey, whoa whoa! What plan?" He retorts, raising his hands up in innocence.
"His plan!" I spat, pointing directly at Thomas who stood there in bewilderment.
"I don't know what you're talking about!" Michael scoffed.
I quickly butt in, shouting in anger and betrayal. "Oh don't give me that crap!! You said you've been watching me for months in that stupid bar, you knew who I was! You knew from the beginning!"
"I don't even know who he is!" He defended and I immediately opened my mouth to speak.
Thomas' voice caught me off guard.
"He wasn't in any plan," he said calmly, standing there in his nice suit. It pissed me off just looking at him.
"What do you mean? Who the hell even is this guy?" Michael interrupted, getting protective.
Thomas noticed this and raised an eyebrow coolly at him. "I'm Thomas, and who are you?" I could feel the tension begin to form.
"Michael," he responded, and before it could get anymore weird I spoke up.
"This is my ex-fiancé," I sputter out, unsure of how I felt by the term.
Immediately Michael's face washed over with surprise and slight anger. His hands balled up into fists and he took a step closer to me, as if protecting me from Thomas.
"Oh, really?" He asked in a rhetorical manner, slightly gritting his teeth together. I, myself, found it surprising that he would react in that way. My eyebrows knitted together and I stepped away from Michael's protective body.
"Y/n, who is this man?" Thomas asked calmly, but only I could hear the tiniest bit of fright hidden away.
I shook my head, perplexed. The thoughts failed to process thoroughly in my head and I found it difficult to react to everything currently happening.
"Thomas, you have a show to do," I replied without exactly answering his question, holding up obvious signs that I wanted him to leave.
Michael with a grin of triumph took hold of my arm and pulled me back. I reacted by yanking my arm away. Both males looked at me with pleading, lost eyes like a bunch of puppies.
I completely swallowed down the knot in my throat and I locked away the feelings which I should've been expressing but didn't want to.
"But y/n-" Thomas attempted to speak up, but I continued to shut him down. I couldn't allow him to come back into my life, not after everything that has happened.
"But nothing!" I shouted, feeling like an angered mother with two irritating boys.
"You are going to finish your show," I ordered aggressively at Thomas, then darted my eyes at Michael. "And you will be watching him. Do I make myself clear?"
Both men stood in obliged silence, finally noting that I was fuming with rage.
"Good." I felt my teeth grit together as I took one slow step back. My eyes went from the puzzled Michael to Thomas' desperate eyes asking me to stay.
I ripped my gaze off him and proceeded with the walk which I had started.
•••
The thick blankets of my bed wrapped around my shoulders in comfort, holding me protectively as tears only drowned further and further inside me. I remember yesterday vividly; thrashing around and screaming, fed up with my miserable life.
I never imagined how worse it would get within twenty-four hours. I could only imagine myself doing the same thing, only to receive Jason at my door to check on me, but really only because Thomas was paying him to do so.
I had forgotten what it was like to have a friend. The closest I had to a form of relationship was Michael, but a part of me just didn't want to see him ever again. My thoughts trailed back on the girl who I once called my best friend; I bet she was living her perfect live with a new best friend, my face only a vague memory to her.
The darkness consumed me and the digital clock on the nightstand shone the numbers "10:08."
My eyes slowly drifted towards the direction of the door as three clear knocks thumped against it.
Not an inch of my body moved, the blankets soothing me into silence, telling me that it was going to be okay, that I had to just pretend I wasn't here.
10:09. Three more knocks persisted at my door, a voice quickly following.
"Y/n, love... I know you're in there."
My heart clenched only the slightest bit, which only made me realize that I could handle this. After everything, I could handle this.
I rolled myself off the bed and towards the door.
Thomas let out a small breath of relief once my face was revealed. He didn't seem too concerned about the coal black that was behind me. My dress was all rugged and out of place, the neck shifted lower and to the side, my entire bra nearly showing.
"Hey..." I said quietly, tiredness taking over my body. I fixed my dress though I knew none of us cared.
This day was more important. This moment was what we've both been waiting for.
A small glittering light caught my attention and I focused at the small object held in Thomas' hand.
He held it out and everything about him told me that he wanted me to take it.
My wedding ring.
