My Oneshot Book (X Readers and Ships) NO REQUESTS

Rubiks Cube (Ereri)

Alright last ereri I just love this ship. The next few will be Valdangelo. Also, forever check out Fall Out Boy. They are amazing. So yeah. FOB.
And I'm going to write an Ereri book with depressed!Eren bc I seriously think he is. AU. Need suggestions on titles but I am starting now. Thanks. And will have various other anime shippings.
-TRIGGER WARNING-
Eren used to be happy. The he found out he was a Titan.
That made him lose just a little bit of his huge amount of happiness. It worried him, but he tried to look at it as though this was a good thing for humanity. Even Captain Levi said so.
Oh, Captain. Where can he begin? Eren realized he was in love as soon as he met him. No, before he had no idea he was gay. He thought he was completely straight.
And then Mr.Im-super-handsome-and-I'm-a-great-soldier showed up. That messed with Eren. He didn't need anymore problems after knowing he put not only Levi, but the whole Survey Corps in danger by being alive was eating him alive. The guilt was slowing making his way into his brain.
And then the rest of Levi's squad died.
Every single bit of hope Eren Jaeger had was now gone.
Now Eren knew Levi would hate him. Hate him for letting the last bit of family Levi had die. He hated this feeling. Because he knew he would never be good enough.
So he turned to a razor. Pain was what he felt he deserved. Deserved for falling in love with his superior, then letting his whole squad die, and being the very thing his superior wanted gone. He felt like he was one giant, broken dissapointment.
He wished he could feel more pain.
So he distanced himself. From Mikasa, Armin, Levi, everyone. He knew he was alone from the start.
Levi, being the person he is, completely noticed Eren losing all the hope and determination in those bright green eyes he loved so much. He hated seeing Eren like this.
He would do anything for that kid. It's not like they couldn't be romantically involved. There was no official documentation stating they couldn't be in love. So why not try?
But Eren didn't know that. And, frankly, he didn't care, because hurting Levi would kill him inside.
He knew that somehow, someway (if he even got Levi to like him), he would screw things up with Levi. And he couldn't bare that.
So Eren kept himself in his room, and just cut.
He are only occasionally, like a piece of bread, and a sip of water, but the pain he got from not eating and drinking was what he felt like he deserved. He deserved this pain, and so much more.
After about two weeks of not seeing Eren, Levi had enough. He was beyond pissed, and only wanted to see Eren. Since he was in charge of Eren, he was the only one with a key to the basement.
So he left dinner early, and went to check on the brat. He did not expect something as horrifying as what he saw.
He saw Eren, razor in hand, hacking away at his wrists, already fresh cuts littered on them. And, worst of all, on Eren's right arm, were scars spelling out "TITAN".
Levi instantly panicked. He ran and shut the door, grabbed the razor, and took off his shirt for a bandage, and started wrapping up Eren's arm.
Eren, malnourished and exhausted, only uttered one simple word: "Why?"  It was so quiet, Levi almost didn't hear it with his thoughts racing. "What do you mean why? I want to help you."
"No you don't."
His answer just made Levi even more confused.
"You just don't want Humanity's Last Hope to die. That's the only reason. Well guess what? In tired of having the weight of the world on my shoulders. I can't take the pressure. It's too much, and I can't live the life I want to because of stupid ranks and homosexuality not being accepted and me being a Titan, and you have no idea. So I'm sick of this, of people acting like they care. Because it's not going to make a difference when I can see straight through you. So I'm sorry, but no. This isn't how it works. Just let me suffer In peace, please. Because you're the man I love, and I can't have you. I can't, because you don't swing that way, stupid ranks and me being a Titan, and I'm just going to screw things up. So stop with the damn act, and leave me be."
Eren was hoping his confession would scare him off. He honestly thought it would.
Why he didn't expect however, was cold lips being pressed harshly against his.
Eren, being the innocent one he is, hadn't had a kiss before that. So he was completely and utterly confused as to what to do. So he just followed Levi's lead.
Levi was in Heaven. By far, the best kid he'd ever had. And with the man he loved just made it better.
He loved how confused and timid Eren was acting. In all honesty, Levi thought it was cute. But he had bigger issues to deal with, for example, Eren's body.
So, very reluctantly, Levi pulled away from the kiss an looked Eren in the eyes. "You must be fucking blind to think this is a fake mask of concern. I really do love you, and there are no documents saying we can't be together. So don't worry about that. And you are far more human than Titan, and everyone knows that. So Eren, please, tell me where all your razors are, and the last time you ate. Can you do that for me?" Levi said softly.
Yes, Levi could be soft. No, he wasn't always emotionless. He knew Eren needed help, and needed help now.
Eren just nodded reluctantly, actually giving in. "The razors are in the top drawer on the right. And I had a piece of bread about a week ago. That's all."
Levi was shocked at this, but moved quickly. He immediately broke and disposed of all his razors properly, before coming to talk to Eren about the food situation. "How did you go a week without food?" He asked, suspiciously.
"Because I deserve the pain. Thinking that kept me from eating. Pain was my punishment for being me. So that mindset helped me through." By the end, Eren was looking down, being too afraid to look Levi in the eye. He didn't want to see the pity or disappointment.
Levi didn't like that.
"Eren, what were you thinking?! Even Titan powers can't heal starvation! You could have died! You could have left me..." By the end, Levi was on the verge of tears. He didn't want to lose Eren too. Levi quickly pulled Eren down into his lap so he could hold him, because that's what he felt Eren needed. Eren just needed to know he was loved.
But Eren felt completely different right now.
Eren felt like a burden.
I'm making Levi cry, and making him worried. He has enough on his plate right now. Maybe I really need to go. And fast.

That night, Levi stayed with Eren. He was going to stay through the night and make sure Eren felt loved.
This put a damper in Eren's plans.
He wanted to die tonight, and Levi spooning him wasn't helping. He was starting to feel like Levi cared, and now he was afraid to get attached.
He couldn't, not with him being a monster. Not while only being a burden. So Eren quietly slipped out from under Levi's arms, and went to write a note for Levi. Eren was going to die in the hall, rather than being an even bigger burden, and being the first thing Levi wakes up to.
So, Eren left a note.
Dear Levi,
I am truly sorry for making you worry, and being a gigantic burden on you and humanity. But with my final words, I just wanted to make sure you knew this was for the better. This will help you not stress out as much, and give you less responsibility. Please, you and Mikasa defeat the titans. And Levi, live a long and healthy life. I love you.
Sincerely,
Eren.
Ending the note at that, Eren was in his way to the hall, only to have his still healing wrist grabbed by Levi. "No." Was all he said.
Eren tried to twist the word in his favor.
"No? As in, no, stop living? Okay, Captain's orders." He responded.
Apparently, that was not a good thing to do.
Levi pulled Eren back and threw him on the bed. Levi then proceeded to sit on Eren, and since Eren was malnourished and had no more meat on his bones, he couldn't pry Levi off of him.
"You idiot. Do you really think that killing yourself is the best thing to do? No, goddamnit, no! Stay with me! How can I get that through your head? I don't want anything, but to be with you. I just want to be with you. You, and only you."
Eren just couldn't bring himself to believe it.
But he did when Levi started kissing every scar on his body.
It started off on his chest, then his arms, then his stomach. He moved to his legs, Eren moaning lightly at each kiss. It felt like Heaven to him. Realizing now, he figured out, Levi must actually love me to put his mouth on something as dirty as my cuts.
Eren knew, right here, right now, that he was loved.
And he was going to keep it that way.
••••••••
I honestly almost killed Eren and Levi in this. And then I got in a better mood so yeah. Bye. And new anime book too. Keep an eye out for that.