WORLD OF OUR OWN

Chapter 9

TOBY'S P.O.V

I refused to have breakfast at the hotel dining room this morning. First, I felt dizzy from last night's windy weather because too long spent time at the rooftop. Second, I blamed myself for everything. I supposed to. It's meant to be. I wouldn't be as happy as I was before I met Abigail and said sorry for my stupid moves.

"What you want me to bring?" Riley checked on me before left for breakfast.

"Nothing."

"For real bro. It doesn't solve the case."

"I know."

"Tobs..."

"I know it Riley. I just don't feel it."

"I know you don't feel it and all that. But I also need to remind you not to do stupid thing twice in a row. We still have Radio Disney before taking off. Don't make yourself look bad. That one massive press conference later at the airport, Cara might be there."

"I don't want to meet her."

"You should." Riley looked at me in the eyes. "To tell her you're sorry and you have a girlfriend back home."

He left. All of them, including Connor James and the driver. I was alone in hotel room. Now I felt guilty to both girls. Cara was special. Until I realized last night that she wasn't for me. Riley's right. I should take responsibility to tell Cara the truth. No I wouldn't need to let all people know I was dating Abigail because we both agreed not to let it out to the public. But Cara didn't do anything wrong with me. I did it wrong to her and Abigail. She deserved explanation.

"Ready to leave?" James knocked my door. "Everybody's at the lobby."

"Yeah. A minute please."

I took my suitcase because we're ready to check out from the hotel. Suitcases went off to the back of the van. We'd fly straight to Boston this afternoon.

"Hey bro." Connor nodded.

"Hi. Having good breakfast?"

"Yeah. You've eaten something?"

"I guess I've had Sour Patch." I smiled. "Let's go!"

I made it easier for the team today. I didn't put my misery life under the spotlight ever again. Let today be the last day of our wonderful radio tour here in LA. I just wanted to do it correctly this time, then Boston, then home.

The interview with Radio Disney went well. We met one of our lovely friends, Ally Simpson. People were very nice at the Radio Disney station. It was quite a 2 hour interview and now we're ready to leave.

"Alright boys. Listen up. We have one last big interview altogether with local radios at the airport. It will be around 30 minutes. The flight will be at 3:30 pm. Be ready. We're here." James read the schedule for us.

I shut my eyes. I wasn't sure how many radios have been expecting us but Cara might be here. She might be here either to get another exclusive news for her company, or just to come and say goodbye because I told her last night about our schedule.

"Guys I'm gonna take a minute." I pointed to male toilet sign.

"Sure." Connor replied.

I washed my face and fixed the look. Dang my face looked horrible. I couldn't hide my sadness. This whole thinking process got me cut in the throat so I basically ended up swallowing my words all again. Glad my brothers always took it over from me so things wouldn't turn awkward. But I realized I should get on my own feet.

"You're here."

A soft girl voice I recognized the most.

"Hi." I walked toward her slowly. "You're here too."

"Why deleted our pictures?"

"Cara... I need to tell you something."

"Yeah? What is it?"

"I've had a girlfriend."

I shut my eyes. Ready to hear her shout or anything. I glimpsed at the bros. Riley nodded at me to keep going, because the press would be started in 10 minutes, which I still had time to do my 'business'.

"Legit girlfriend?"

"Legit girlfriend. And it's been a while." I grabbed her hand. "I know what I did to you was wrong. I thought I would find the happiness I seek in you. And guess what? I did, Cara. Because you're amazing. But I can't. I've realized I always love her more. I know it's hard for you..."

"It'd be harder if we ever trapped much longer." She lifted her chin. "I understand. I don't wanna be second choice either."

"No you better not. Because you're worth much better guy than a Toby McDonough."

"Thanks for last night. It was still amazing for me." She whispered, didn't even try to hide those tears from me.

I swept her chin and kissed her hands. "You're a wonderful companion. Believe me, you'll get much better boyfriend. He'll treat you right."

"So...it's the goodbye, isn't it?"

"I'm afraid so." I stared into her eyes. "But not that we won't visit you guys anymore though."

"Oh snap. You will come back. Long term mission with Kiis, remember? You'll be trapped with me. Sorry." Cara was acting silly.

"Hahaha... That's right." I nodded.

"Tobs? We're ready." Riley approached us two and grabbed my shoulders. "Cara, will you be at the front?"

"Camera's ready!" She shouted happily.

I saw that disappointment. She turned her back at me, faked a happy move back to where she belong, that was in the first row of the press table. Riley rubbed my back. It's hard to deal with your fault especially when you just hurt that heart of an amazing person like Cara.

"Good afternoon guys! Hello!" Connor led us to the camera spot.

"Hey!" They all gave us endless camera flash.

This and that. You know what the press usually asked us. Normal questions about next schedule, next tour, next single, next EP, fans, and all that. I tried not to do so, but my eyes couldn't stop taking a glimpse at Cara. She happened to get that seat in front of me. She's busy writing our answers down into her little note book. At the same time, I embraced myself to really let go of her shadows. No more Cara. She'd be left in LA as a piece of not-so-happy-but-beautiful memory of me. From now on, it's Abigail again. I should redeem my fault.

Please hang on a little more while, love. I'm coming home.