A boy named Blaze

Chapter 11

I flopped down on my bed and closed my eyes. I just wanted to sleep all day tomorrow. Yet tomorrow I have a sleepover and then Sunday night I have the movie date with Matthew. I love Fridays though, I think I'm going to become queen and make everyday Friday.

There would be no school, no work, nothing, just endless Friday or weekend. Also endless summer because I hate snow but I don't know how I could pull that one off. Banning weekdays are gonna be hard enough as it is. Shit never mind, it would take a lot of work, maybe I will pay someone to do it.

Now I just need to make some money to pay the god damn guy. Damn this plan is sounding harder then I thought. I sighed and rolled over onto my side, grabbing my phone, and rolling back over. I grumbled and looked at the time. It was already midnight but I couldn't sleep. I started to scroll down my contact list to see who I can text and would be up.

I decided not to text Matthew for he would just think something was wrong, I mean what does he have to worry about. This is nothing, a couple bad boys were nothing. Hell they weren't even that bad I mean sure Blazecan handle himself on the streets and is good with a gun and all but Bry was just pathetic.

Anyways I can handle myself better then that pampered, sheltered boy. I shook my head, what am I saying. Why am I being so mean, Matthew isn't a pampered, sheltered boy. Yet I couldn't stop being so bitchy towards Matthew right now. When I thought of a man all I could think off Blaze.

Should I dump Matthew, I'm not sure. Suddenly Matthew didn't seem so great and I could feel the old me starting to slip back into my steps. It happened at every school whenever I get bored of pretending I am someone I just slip into my old ways. I don't know if I am pretending right now, it feels natural, yet it always does.

No matter how natural it always feels I always slip into my old playing ways. I guess I am a player at heart or it might just be old habits die hard. Not sure but whatever it is I can feel it slowly pulling me into player mode. Yet I cant hurt Matthew like that, can I.

I almost feel like I need to go in the mode I do at those rare times when I like a guy more then, you know, a day or a week but he doesnt like me. Then I go in flirting with other guys, ignoring him, and then flirt with him. After flirting I ignore him, it works because it confuses them. I let them know they are interested but have other options.

Yet I haven't done that in awhile but sadly that's the feeling creeping in my body. When I get this feeling don't mess with me, I will get that boy, always do. Yet all the guys look at me anyways and so I wouldn't need to pull out old tricks to get them. Even Bry would melt like butter and I don't like anyone. This is crazy, I like Matthew more then any boy toy.

I continued to scroll down the contact list, passing Matthew and all my friends. My phone clicked to the top again and I saw Ashton's number. I know I shouldn't because I am no acting right and thinking about turning into the old me but I clicked his number.

I sent him 'hey' and waiting for him to text me back. I knew he would be awake and there is no doubt in my mind that he would answer my text. Sure enough not even a minute later Ashton texted me back 'hi'. I smiled and relaxed into bed with a smirk on my face and an evil glint in my eye.

I'm not going to cheat on Matthew I'm going to be good and stay with him. That what he wants right, for me to be a good little girl. I will be and not turn any boys into bed toys and I will choose to be only with Matthew. I just might flirt a little, I mean nothing is wrong with that right.

Again I smiled as I  was looking at my phone, replying back to Ashton. He is no better then me, he is dating Kate. Yet just the fact he replied I know that he is not over me and that again made me smile. I smiled even bigger knowing that I could take him from Kate without even trying. I didn't have this much fun since I was battling Angla with our glare match.

Yet I still felt something missing. Something wrong, and I couldn't place what it was. It was almost like I was missing someone yet I had no one to miss. Well I had Matthew but I would bet all my money that he was not the one who I was missing. That should bring me shame but tonight it didn't, tonight it almost brought me comfort. I think I might have cracked tonight and if I did I blame Blaze for scaring me. I leaned my head back, texting and flirting with Ashton, and he countered all my flirty texts with some of his own.

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Sorry guys to make Tara so like evil in here but she will get better and you will see another side to her later on. Please read and comment and tell me what you think!! I promise I will read every comment and reply to messages!!!! ILY guys thanks for being my fans and tell you friends to read my book please if u like it urself!!!

~Natasha <3