The Secret Holder

IX. Keeping Quiet

We took my car so the drive would be faster.
"So, the hospital, then?"

"Yes, Scott. I've told you a million times. The hospital."

"Okay,"

I can't stop moving. My knees are twitching, my head is pounding, and I can't seem to get my hands to stop shaking.
"Scott. Something's wrong."

"What now?" He parks my car, and gets out. "Come on. What are you waiting for? We should go."

I climb out of my car, and the both of us walk up to the hospital. So many terrible things happen here, but this needs to be done.
We hurry in to find Scott's mom already walking towards us. "You two-Come with me. Right now." Melissa's face looks pale, like she hasn't gotten any sleep.

"But Mom, I thought you were home?"

"Well, I wasn't." She walks down a series of halls and turns, then leads us into a small room that looks like...the morgue. Melissa's face growing whiter, she lifts a sheet of a body to the face of none other than Claudia Stilinski. We're too late.
In shock, I am unable to move, so I just stand where I am. Scott pulls me into an embrace, a single tear of his rolling down his cheek and onto my forehead. I want to cry, but I can't. There's nothing I can do, nothing I can say to make this better. Nothing.

Scott's mom looks on the verge of tears, but somehow she holds herself together. "So how is this possible?"

"I don't know," I reply quietly. "She contacted me and told me to tell Stiles that she was here." A sob finally breaks from my throat, and it stings. Scott just hugs me tighter, then releases, letting me have my space.

"Was she gone when you found her?" Scott asks, wiping his face. He is more emotional than I thought.

"No, I was sitting at the front desk with Ted when she showed up. She was covered in blood, and we brought her in. She kept saying this riddle thing, but none of us knew what she meant. Then her heart rate began to slow down after that. Before we could get a diagnosis or authorization for surgery, she was gone. We tried the defibrillator when she flatlined, but it was no use."

"Can you remember any of the riddle she was repeating?" I surprise myself by saying.

"I don't know, it was something like 'Summer lupus, sea-level land'," she mentions, covering Claudia's face again with the sheet. "So I was obligated by law to put down her time of death in the public record. But, until we figure out how the hell this even happened, no one knows about this, okay? No one."

"No one, Mom? Not even Stiles?"

"Not even Stiles." Melissa's face is sad, yet unrelenting. "It's the best for him, and the best for you that the both of them don't know we were involved."

By the end of the conversation, my face is streaked with tears. Why did this have to end this way? Would Claudia still be alive if I knew what I was doing? Scott hugs me again, but it doesn't make me feel any better. It makes me miss him more when I wish I didn't. This is wrong. We are keeping a secret we have no right to keep.

"Only until we know why. So when we do, we let them know." She sighs, and puts her hand on Scott's shoulder.

"I know this is a lot to deal with, but it's 3:00 am on a school night. You guys should at least try to get some sleep. Lydia, you can crash at the house with Scott, we don't want to risk waking up your mom at this hour."

I nod, even though I remember my mother isn't even home, and follow Scott back out to the car. I know I can't bear to be alone right now.
"We can go get the motorcycle tomorrow." Scott mentions in a tired voice.

"Alright." I strap in my seat belt, and lean my forehead on the cold glass. I did this to Stiles. He lost his mom again, but this time because of me.
Before I know it, Scott has my car parked in the driveway of his house. The small bright light by the door lights up the sidewalk, and shines over the window, reminding me of the layout of my house.
Later, Scott gives me a toothbrush and some blankets to sleep on the couch.

"Goodnight, Lydia," He wishes quietly, pulling up the covers for me, and turning down some lights.

"Goodnight." I close my eyes, as he approaches the stairs.

"Wait, Scott?"

I hear him pause.

"How are you doing this?" In the dark, I play with a loose string on one of the blankets Scott let me borrow.

"I don't know." I can barely make out him continue to walk up the stairs.

Claudia Stilinski is dead. Again.
My mother is still MIA. I'm trying not to worry about her, or it will all become too much. How can anyone do this?