The Secret Holder

XXVI. We're Good

Before I can even process what has just happened, I run into the elevator and push the "1" button so that I can go to the medical record room to find Stiles.

Once the elevator gets to the first floor, I leave in a rush to get to Stiles. I wonder if he's found it yet. All of it...all of the secrets.

I burst through the door of the record room to find Stiles knelt down, an entire box of file folders strewn about the floor.

He looks up at me with watery eyes. "She was here. She was back. And I...missed her."

"Stiles...I'm sorry. I can't imagine how you must be feeling," Guilt overwhelms my senses.

Stiles blinks several times, and wipes under his eye with the back of his thumb. "I just don't understand...how this just...passed me by."

I walk forward slowly, putting my hand on his shoulder for a brief moment. "I'm so sorry, Stiles. I'll leave you alone...give you some time,"

He stands, one of his hands reaching out in front of the other. "No—um, don't go. Let me just—" he picks up the file I am assuming is his mother's. "—take this. I can drive you back."

"What about your dad?"

"He said to go home and get some sleep. I didn't want to leave but he insisted. Plus, uh...I have something I kind of have to talk to you about."

...

As we walk out of the automatic hospital doors, I feel the chilling air. There are sirens to the left of us. The body of the Desert Wolf is on its side, a large shard of glass run through her chest.

Stiles's eyes widen considerably. "Is that...?"

"Yeah," I look down.

"Did you kill her... just like that?"

"It was out of self-defense," I told him honestly. I moved my hair, showing the bruises on my neck from her choking me.

"Right. Sorry." Stiles winces.

We get in the jeep, and put on our seatbelts.

I finally speak. "It's fine. I admit it. I wanted to kill her. But when I actually had to..." I look down again and shake my head.

Cautiously, he takes my hand and my chest is ignited at the contact. "'When you actually had to', what?" he prompts, his voice soft.

"Scott was right. It didn't make me feel better." I play with his hand a little. "I don't...feel better."

Stiles looks at me without saying anything for a few moments. Then he speaks again. "I wish I could tell you what would change this,"

I let his hand go and look out the window, then back at him. He puts the car in drive.

"Enough...things about me," I chew on the inside of my cheek. "Tell me about your dad. He is okay, right?"

"He was knocked out, in a body bag in the morgue. There was a...tag..."

"What did it say?"

"It just said 'deceased' and 'donor' on it...I think that they were going to harvest his organs." Stiles turns out of the hospital parking lot.

"That's terrible, Stiles,"

"I know. I could have lost him. But the way things went, I didn't. I can't really think about what could have happened...especially with this thing with my mom."

"You're right, you can't,"

Stiles turns onto a country road.

"You aren't taking me home?" I ask.

"We're going to the clinic. I wanna show you something."

...

We pull up to the clinic, and get out of the jeep, walking to the entrance of the small building. Stiles unlocks the door with a spare key that he had made from Scott's.

He pulls out a chair for me at a table, and then sits down himself.

"Okay," Stiles seems to be talking to himself. He pulls out his phone, and after a few seconds of looking, passes it to me.

It's security footage of Malia talking to the Desert Wolf. I tap the screen so that I can see the date. It dates before Stiles and I had that confrontational argument about Malia being a part of the Desert Wolf's plans. Wait. I almost lose my breath at the realization. Does that mean...?

"You believed me," I said out loud.

Stiles nods. "I was...suspicious of Malia, even before I brought it up to you in the library."

"Why didn't you just tell me at the time?"

"I didn't want to believe it, okay? It made me feel stupid. I know...I should have trusted you,"

"Stiles," I protest.

"I should have. You have been right about almost everything."

"She's important to you...what else were you supposed to do?"

"She was important to me." Stiles corrects me.

I put the phone in his hand, and he shoves it in his pocket. Then he reaches over the table, and puts his hand over mine, his palm burning my knuckles.

"There's something else."

I nod, encouraging him to speak.

"And that's...obviously not the only mistake I've made lately." He squeezes my hand lightly. "Ever since summer...after Eichen and that whole messed up Nogitsune thing, I promised myself I would try to...be better. Try and be better than the Void me was. But instead I've made choices that I kind of hate now."

Stiles looks up from our hands to my eyes. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have pushed you away."

I open my mouth to respond, but he cuts me off. "Please, don't say it's okay."

"But it is," I say gently.

He tightens his grip on my hand, and then allows it to loosen again.

Stiles's eyes lighten, and he exhales sharply, as if he had just gotten something off of his chest. "So...we're good?"

I smile halfheartedly. There's still something I want to say. "Yeah. We're good."