Flamepaw's Destination

Chapter 23

Flamepaw remained motionless for a few moments, not sure how to react. She couldn't believe it. She was carrying Barkpaw's kits, and she had been oblivious to it this entire time.

Soon, thoughts of anxiety began to fill her mind. What if the birth of the kits went wrong? What if she was too young to have kits? How could she raise kits as rogues? How would she provide for them? Her heart pounded with the stress.

And she knew she had to tell Barkpaw eventually. Though they weren't ever officially mates, they knew the love they felt for each other. But what if he didn't want to take on the responsibility of being a father? What if he left her? Flamepaw felt just about ready to burst into tears.

"Flamepaw, are you there?" Barkpaw called.

Flamepaw froze and spun around, finding him peeking his head out of some bushes.

"I—um—yes," she stammered. "Just getting some water."

"Oh, well, I spoke to Mothwing, and it seems she's feeling better now. Are you ready to come back?" he asked.

"Yes, I..."

"Good. Let's go," he said, leading her through the brush.

Flamepaw followed closely behind, guilt filling her. She desperately wanted to tell Barkpaw the news, but she was unsure how he would react. She trailed behind him, debating back and forth between telling him or not.

"Barkpaw," she spoke up at last.

"Yeah?" he called from ahead of her.

"Um...I have to tell you something--"

She stopped talking as soon as they came out of the bushes and into a clearing. Mothwing sat there cleaning her fur, her eyes widening as they fell upon Flamepaw.

"Here we are," Barkpaw said, coming to a halt in the clearing. "Sorry, what were you going to say?"

"Um, nothing."

Barkpaw seemed satisfied with this answer and simply shrugged.

"I'm sorry, Flamepaw," Mothwing confessed. "For getting just a bit high-strung back there. It's been very difficult for me to cope with all of this."

"I understand. It's been difficult for me too," Flamepaw assured her.

"And you're right. I know we have to think about all this eventually, but I can't tonight," Mothwing explained.

"That's okay, Mothwing. Maybe tomorrow?"

"Maybe," Mothwing said quietly.

Flamepaw nodded, though she desperately wanted to tell everyone the news. She felt as if she were carrying a large secret (literally). She was surprised that Mothwing and Barkpaw didn't seem to notice at all. Maybe it wasn't as noticeable as she thought. 

She stared longingly in Barkpaw's direction, desperately wanting to tell him the news. She knew she had to tell him today as soon as possible, but she didn't want to tell him with Mothwing around. She wasn't sure how her friend would react, and she wanted Barkpaw to be the first to know.

Unfortunately, it seemed they could rarely find alone time for the rest of the day. They were always walking side by side as they traveled, and it seemed that Flamepaw could find no spare time with Barkpaw.

As evening fell, she was beginning to give up when Barkpaw finally spoke up.

"This clearing seems like it'll make do for today," he suggested.