Fighting Between the Mills

Next day

It been 13 hours since I last seen Harvey, I just can't be believe I kissed him and he never backed away

I still can't believe I did it .
Like I haven't even known him for long , and I end up kissing him .

Should I give him a call and explain why I did it or do I just leave it and let it slip .

7am : I decide to turn my phone back on, after what happened yesterday I didn't want to hear from anyone .

I know we both kissed but  none of us back off from each other , it was like we wanted to kiss .

Beep ...
Whenever I hear that beep noise I know I've had messages and calls coming in, or voicemails.

I slowly learn over and town my phone over .

Harvey: 20 miss call and 25 text message .

What does he want .

I go and open all of his text

Harvey :
"Hello can we speak"
" we ok"
"Leah why aren't you picking up all of my calls , are we ok."
"Leah your really worrying me what happened"

and so on. It was like he was worried about me as I wouldn't answer his call.

I'm still not sure if  I should give him a text or call back .

After what seen liked a little while ago, I realise I have voicemail message from max.

Max
"Hey Leah, I hope you are well. I was just wounding it you could give me a call back. It's about Harvey".

Oh no what happened to him.
I hope he doesn't blame himself for us kissing or for me not answering him .

I decide to ring max back .

7:45 am
Me:
"Hey max sorry I didn't answer you back yesterday my phone died and my dad borrows my charger and forget to give it back and I didn't even think to ask for it . You ok, I seen your voicemail and it said it about Harvey . Everything ok. Is he ok ."

It about 2 minutes before max even speak , I feel like I've just woken him up .

Max:
" hello Leah, don't apologise it all fine. Yea we are ok well I'm ok , Harvey isn't. When he came back yesterday after the picnic with you, he just didn't seem his self. When I went to speak to him he wouldn't tell me much. All he would say was he was tired and picnic went really well and that you might do it again some time .

It wasn't like him how he was talking to
Me like he would say short answer or keep telling me to leave him alone . I was wounding if you could tell me what happened on this picnic".

Oh no max wants to know what going on. Do I tell him about the kiss or will he hate me .

Me:
" hey Yh no problem. Picnic went well we had music which we dance and danced to and then we sat and spoken for a long time and enjoy some lovely food. Which you know is lovely food.

What can I say well later on we both felt this feeling inside of us , and we kissed . But we stayed kissing for a while . Without backing off .

After we both left like nothing happened but it
Did . I was confused as I didn't know if I led him on or if we really do like each other.

I feel so so bad liked , I haven't even known him for long and I didn't pull back when we kissed.
He might have a girlfriend who knows .
Plus he been calling me and texting me
And I've just blanked him . Well like I said to you about my phone last night but he might of thought she didn't like me anymore".

After explaining everything to max , he seemed to understand what happened and said he would try and talk to Harvey for me. He said I don't know yet but I might be able to get him to give u another call back and you two can talk .

What is there to say between us. We kissed. What more does he want me to say  to Harvey .

If he didn't want me to do it would have pulled off.

  While I'm waiting or if he even gonna bother I decide to get up and get my self dressed to go for a walk, I like getting some fresh are in my lungs and going for a walk is a good ideas, plus it helps me to find new walking routes .

I pop on some leggings and a loose fitted top in case I get warm I also pop on my jumper which was from Primark .

Hair goes up in to a messy bun, and a little bit of makeup. Concealer, mascara and lip balm don't need a lot for a walk. Might sweat it off. Who knows .

I make sure I grab my bag and I add a bottle water, some cash incase I go past and shop and want to pop in and my headphone for music.

Just as I'm about to pop my trainer on my phone buzz's and guess who it is. Harvey .

Me:
"Hello, look I'm so sorry for what happened yesterday I didn't meant to kiss you , it just happened in the moment . Please don't hate me . I feel so bad as you probably have a girlfriend ."

Harvey :
"Leah please don't feel bad. I wanted to you to kiss me . Since the first day I met you and had to work with you.  I felt feeling  towards you. Didn't you wonder why I wanted to speak time with you but couldn't as max would always come. The picnic was the only time me and you could he alone . Leah I don't have a girlfriend. I haven't had one for a while. Please Leah say something ."

What was I to say. I didn't really know what I could say. So I just said something .

Me :
"Harvey I never went knew you wanted alone time with me. I thought u only said it because max was getting on your nerves and you wanted him to give u space alone with a mate.
I don't feel so bad now that you told me
About me kissing you. I felt so bad that you didn't want me to but now I know you wanted me to.
I'm glad I've cleared it up about you not having a girlfriend. At least I can stop stressing about it .
Anyways I like hanging out with you. Did you want to hang out again some other time. We can go to the park , or you can come here , if my dad say it ok."

You might wonder why I've got to ask
My dad first . Well he works so hard and three times where he sleeping as he busy working or doing stuff just to be able to support me. You got to remember he a single dad . So he working super hard.
Which I'm grateful.

It hard to think that mum  not around anymore, I do miss her and so does dad but we just think of all the good time we had together as a family before she passed.