Troian Bellisario: Just Me & My Girl

Not a Happy Family

Troian's Pov

"I'm sorry." Keegan stammers "I-I don't know why I just did that. It was uncalled for."

"It was." I nod, swallowing the nervous lump in my throat. Keegan looks at his feet in shame, his face going beet red "But I never said that I didn't enjoy it."

He slowly looks back up at me, his eyes slightly widened "You enjoyed it?"

Now it's my turn to be embarrassed. What if he didn't enjoy the kiss like I did? Do I tell him that I liked our kiss, even if he doesn't feel the same way? Keegan could've just been in the moment when he decided to kiss me.

"Well...yeah I enjoyed it." I say quietly "It was unexpected, but I liked it."

"I kind of surprised myself when I kissed you," Keegan admits "But I'm glad that I did." I can't help but smile at Keegan's words, because I'm also glad that he kissed me. Still, I have to wonder what this means for him and I. Do we just go on with our lives and pretend that the kiss never happened, or do we take it further? I don't have feelings for Keegan, but when he kissed me, I couldn't focus on anything but having my lips on his.

"Troian?" Keegan says, breaking me out of my train of thought "Do you think that what you said earlier is true?"

"About you and Aspen?" I ask. He nods.

"Well...I don't know. But can't you see the resemblance?" I can feel my cheeks go red as I speak "I don't know if I'm just crazy, but she has your eyes Keegan." He stares at the floor, trying to take everything in.

"How long ago did you realize that she looks like me?" Keegan asks "Is this something you've known for a while?"

I shake my head "Only about a week." I nervously play with my fingers, not sure if telling Keegan was a good idea after all. What if he's not Aspen's dad? Now he'll think I'm crazy for even letting the thought cross my mind. But we still don't know if he's her dad or not, Keegan said himself that the night of the party is a huge blur. I guess the right thing to do was tell Keegan, it's the only way I'll really be able to figure anything out.

An awkward silence spreads over us, and I can tell that Keegan has no clue what to say next. He must be pretty shocked right now.

"What do we do now?" I ask feebly. I don't mean just about Aspen and him, but about me and him. If I said I didn't like our kiss, I'd be lying.

"I don't know," Keegan admits "But if you don't mind, I need some time before we do DNA tests or anything."

"Oh, y-yeah, that's okay." I say, even though I'm not sure how much time he means.

"Troian, I love Aspen, don't get me wrong." He adds "She's an amazing little girl, and I've loved her ever since I first met her in the hospital. It's just...I need to let this soak in before I find out if she's my daughter or not."

"I understand, Keegan." I reply, looking into his crystal blue eyes "Take as much time as you need. This is big news."

"Thanks." He looks down at the floor, frowning. I hope I don't regret telling Keegan that I think he's Aspen's dad.

"If you don't mind, Troy, I'm going to get going." Keegan says quietly, looking back up at me. Without giving me a chance to reply, he turns around and walks downstairs. I stay frozen in place as I hear the front door open, then after a second or two, click shut. I still don't move, not knowing what I should do now. Telling Keegan was supposed to make me feel better, but instead, I just feel more on edge then before. I don't know what I'm supposed to do now, the only thing that's on my mind is what just happened with Keegan. Both what I just told him, and our kiss. I know that it's all I'll be able to think about for a while.

"Mommy!" I hear Aspen yell.

"I'm up here, Asp." I call back, my voice cracking slightly. I watch her as she comes up the stairs and runs toward me, her light brown hair flying back behind her.

"Why did Keegan go?" She asks innocently, staring up at me with her big blue eyes. Keegan's eyes.

"Well, baby." I begin as I pick her up "He had something else he had to do."

"When will he come back?" Aspen asks, twirling my hair in her fingers.

"I don't know." I admit. She leans forward and lays her head on my shoulder, her small arms hugging around my neck.

"Does Keegan love me?" She asks in a tiny voice. I kiss the top of her head, massaging circles into her back as I do.

"Very much, Aspen."