Troian Bellisario: Just Me & My Girl

The Little White Sticks Don't Lie

One Week Later
Troian's Pov

"You have to take a test." Shay says blankly.

"No." I reply "No way. Not yet."

"You can't just put it off forever." She replies.

"I know that, but I can for at least a little while longer." I sigh "Just for a couple more weeks."

"Yeah, and what's after that? Wait another week, and then when that's over wait another?" She scoffs "Because eventually people are going to start noticing before you even know if it's true or not."

"Okay, I'm sorry." I say annoyedly "But I'm not ready yet. I'm not ready to find out if I'm pregnant." Shay sits down on the couch beside me, giving me a look of sympathy. I hate that she's taking pity on me.

"Look, I know this is hard, but you can't just ignore this until you start showing." She sighs "I'll go to the pharmacy, buy you some pregnancy tests, then you'll go in the bathroom and take them. At least then you can stop driving yourself crazy with wondering if you're pregnant or not. You'll finally have an answer." I lean my head forward in my hands, exhaling loudly.

"I'm not prepared for an answer yet." I say in barely a whisper "What if it comes back positive?" Shay just pulls me into a comforting hug, staying silent for a moment.

"If it's positive, then I guess you're gonna have a new little kiddo." She says as she ends the embrace and looks me in the eyes.

"But what if it's not what Keegan wants." I blurt out "What if he gets mad?"

"Troi, you and I both know he's not the guy who'll get angry at this. He has enough sense to know that getting mad will only make things worse." She reassures me "But if for some crazy reason he does, I'll beat the shit out of him. At least I'll try to." Despite everything that's going on, despite the huge whirlpool of emotions I'm experiencing right now, I mange to crack a smile. But as I focus back on the topic at hand, it disappears quicker than it came.

"We just got things sorted out." I whine "Figuring out who Aspen's dad is, Keegan and I's relationship getting back on good terms. We were finally getting used to how everything is now, stuff was finally becoming less complicated. But now...now it's all going to change again. Just because of a stupid fucking faulty condom."

"Hey..." Shay starts in a sympathetic tone "Yeah, things will change, but that doesn't mean they'll get worse. Just think of how scared you felt when you found out you were pregnant with Aspen. But now, can you even imagine not having her in your life? Everything would be so different, and not in a good way. Even seeing you just look at Aspen I can tell that you love her more than you've ever loved anything, and I know you're going to love another baby just as much." I just stare down at my lap, unsure of how to reply. Although I know she's right, I know I'll love my second child as unconditionally as I do Aspen. I just never expected to fall pregnant right now.

"I hope Keegan at least tries to act a little happy." I sigh. I don't know if I'd be able to handle seeing him upset when I told him the news.

"I'm sure things will go fine." Shay replies "Although, we'll find out sooner if you would actually agree to take a pregnancy test." I jokingly roll my eyes at her, trying to convince myself not to be so nervous. But it's impossible. If it's true, if I am carrying Keegan's baby, then so much will change. We won't be just two people in a relationship anymore, we'll now suddenly have a baby together too. We've never even talked about having kids with each other, it's just never come up. But now, now it could all change.

"Okay." I agree quietly "I'll take a test."

Shay gets ready to go to the store, saying I can stay here at her house while she does. I agree, not really feeling like leaving the couch. I initially came over to her house because I have a day off and Aspen's with her dad, so I wasn't really doing anything. But a little while after I got here, I started thinking about my suspicion of being pregnant, and suddenly felt like I had to tell someone. Shay is a supportive person and always has good advice, so I knew that she was the right person to confess to. And as of right now, she's the only one that knows.

I lay down on the couch, pulling the blanket up to my ears. I try and think about something else, but can't seem to take my mind off of what I'm about to find out. But how can I, I'm so close to knowing if I am in fact pregnant or not. Thinking about it makes me feel numb all over, almost like I'm not really myself anymore. Just the thought sends such a huge wave of nervousness through me. Actually, not a wave; a tsunami.

I don't know exactly how long it'd been when Shay got back, but I do know that I haven't moved from my curled up position on the couch since she left. She walks into the room, a bag in her hand and a sympathetic look on her face. She crouches down beside me, studying me for a few moments.

"I bought you five tests." She finally says "I know it would make me feel better having proof from more than just one." I pull the blanket off and sit up, immediately wanting to lay back down again.

"Thank you." I say truthfully "I don't know what I would do without you." She just smiles and gives me the bag, hugging me before I walk into the bathroom.

Shay's Pov

I await anxiously on the couch as Troian takes the pregnancy tests. I know how nervous she is about this, and I hope she doesn't get upset if they're positive. Sure she didn't plan this, but I know she'll love her baby just as she loves Aspen.

My foot bounces wildly as the minutes go by, and I grow anxious to know if she's pregnant or not. I know you have to wait a couple minutes for the tests to show the results, and I think it'll be nearing that mark soon. Maybe, the tests already came back positive, but Troian's too shocked to do anything right now. Although I don't hear her crying, but on the other I think she would tell me right away if she wasn't pregnant. I decide not to hover or pressure her, and instead wait for Troian to come to me.

After what seems like hours but I know is only a few minutes, I hear the bathroom door open. Troian walks out, an unreadable expression on her face.

"I-I can't do it." She says quietly, avoiding my eye contact.

"What?" I question "You didn't take the tests?"

She shakes her head "No, I took the tests. I just can't bring myself to look at them." I stand up when she makes eye contact with me, hating how scared she looks.

"Do you want me to look for you?" I ask. She just nods gently. With a deep breath and a pounding heart, I step into the bathroom. Troian stands shyly behind me, her hands held in front of her. The five pregnancy tests sit on the counter, but I don't let myself look at what they say yet. First, I hug Troian, telling her that no matter what they say, it's going to be okay. She wipes a tear from her cheek and nods, her lips quivering. Ignoring the sound of my heart beating loudly in my ears, I force myself to turn and look at the pregnancy tests.

They're positive. All of them.