Troian Bellisario: Just Me & My Girl

You Can't Stay Mad Forever

One Week Later
Troian's Pov

Ring ring.

No answer.

Ring ring.

Call declined.

That's the fourth time I've tried calling Keegan today. He's been ignoring me since our fight nearly two weeks ago, only interacting with me for strictly Pretty Little Liars purposes only. As soon as the scene is cut, he leaves the room without giving me even a second glance. But even then, not a single word is spoken between us that isn't a line from a script. Saying that Keegan is mad at me would be an understatement.

I call him again, hoping that maybe this time he'll actually answer. No luck. I frustratedly throw my phone on the couch beside me, to which it bounces off and lands on the floor. I sigh heavily and pick it up off the area rug, setting it down beside me. I try calling one more time, only to get the exact same beep beep beep that means he hung up.

That's it. I'm done with Keegan's immature behaviour. I'm going to settle this once and for all, whether he likes it or not.

I walk out to my car and get into the drivers seat, not having to worry about getting Aspen in the back. She's spending the day at my mom's, upon both of their requests. It actually turned out being a huge convenience, because now I can go straight to Keegan's without finding a babysitter first.

Once I get to Keegan's, I march determinedly up the short path to the front door. I knock three times, anger beginning to boil inside of me. The door flings open, revealing a surprised looking Keegan. I don't give him a chance to say anything.

"Do you think you could maybe answer your cellphone once in a while!?" I ask angrily.

"What are you doing here?" He asks in a disgusted tone, completely ignoring my question.

"Look, we need to talk." I say, stepping inside the house and shutting the door behind me.

"There's nothing to talk about, Troian." He replies cooly "You cheated on me, and I said I needed a break."

"I kissed him, okay? That's it." I say sternly "And to be fair, at that point I thought that you'd slept with another girl and got her pregnant. I think that the choice I made can pass as a spur of the moment decision, I mean to my knowledge at that time, you were sleeping with someone else the duration of our entire relationship."

"Listen, the point is that I'm not going to have this argument with you again." Keegan says calmly "So if that's all you came here to do, you might as well go now."

"No, that's not what I came for." I quickly say "I came to tell you something." He looks taken aback, but continues talking anyway.

"And what's that?" He asks. I sigh, not sure how to approach the topic. I decide to get right to it, and not beat around the bush.

"Well...I wanted to tell you that the paternity test appointment for Aspen and Max is today." I say awkwardly "We'll finally have proof of who her dad is." A look of shock washes over Keegan's face, but he slowly replaces it with a small smile that I can tell is forced.

"That's—uh—exciting." He says as he stares down at the floor "Tell me how it goes, I guess."

"The thing is, I...um...was wondering if maybe you wanted to come along?" I ask shakily. He just gives me a look of confusion.

"What, so I can be there when the doctor says Aspen is Max's daughter and not mine?" He scoffs "Not to be rude, but I don't want to be there for that." I go to respond, but realize that he's probably right. Not only would that be devastating for Keegan, but also awkward for everyone else.

"Okay." I say quietly "But I still have another question."

"Go ahead." He says.

I swallow the nervous lump in my throat "I was wondering where we stand...relationship wise." A silence begins to grow between Keegan and I, which eats into me like termites into wood. I can't help but fear the worst, that he'll say he's breaking up with me. Even though we're going through an extremely rough patch right now, I still love Keegan.

"I'm just angry." He says "I need time to cool down. But I know that what we had was special, and I'm not willing to let that go. I'm not ready to move on, Troian." My heart does a giddy leap, but I know that I can't say that I feel the same way, not yet, anyway. He's been shutting me out for weeks, he can't just have me back the second he pleases.

"I'm not just an object at your disposal, Keegan." I say "You can't just toss me out and leave me in the dark, then take me back because you're ready. What about me? I have feelings about all this too, you know."

"I know, I'm sorry." He apologizes "But I just want you to know that I don't want our relationship going down the drain. We're going to make it work when the time is right, okay?"

I just nod, unable to look into his eyes. As the silence grows, I realize that now is my time to leave, especially because Keegan and I are currently on good terms. I don't want our visit to end with screaming and yelling like last time.

"Well, I should get going." I say quietly "But I'll let you know how the paternity test goes." I open the front door and step outside, still not looking into his eyes.

"Troian?" Keegan calls as I begin to walk away. I turn around, looking at him expectantly.

"Tell Aspen I say hi." He says.

I nod "Of course. She's been asking about you, you know."

"Really?" He questions happily, his face lighting up.

"Yeah, she's wondering why you don't come by anymore, and why she doesn't see you on set." I tell him.

"Oh." He stammers "I'm sorry. Tell her that I'm gonna hang out with her soon, if you're okay with that." I smile, hoping that Keegan somehow doesn't notice.

"Yeah, that's fine." I reply, turning around and walking back to my car without another word.

As I drive away, I realize something. No matter how mad I was at Keegan, and no matter how mad I'll ever be, I'm never going to be able to stop loving him. Never.