Razor Blade

Chapter 3

As tears stung my eyes, I ran down the hallway and into the bathroom. I rushed into a stall, slammed the door behind me, and locked the door. I dropped to the floor and started crying. Not only could I believe Laurie saw them, but I couldn't believe she was willing to go as low as shouting it for, what might as well be the whole world, to see. I swear, her blood runs black and her heart is as cold as dry ice. She's evil in every way. But, it's not like I can do anything about it. If only I knew something about her that could easily destroy her. If only...

I heard footsteps by my stall. They knocked on the door. I managed to choke out "What?" but I'm pretty sure they couldn't understand me. "Chelsea?" The voice sounded familiar. "Ha-Hayley?" It was her. She crawled under the stall to sit with me. She hugged me tight as I started crying harder. My tears soaked her shirt, but she didn't seem to care. "What happened?" I explained to her how Laurie decided to spill my secret to the whole class. "I can't believe she would do that. Do you want me to get her back for you? Because I swear, I won't stop beating her until all the evil bleeds out of her." I managed to laugh as I wiped the tears from my eyes. The bell rang and voices flooded the hallway. "Do you want me to get your stuff or are you okay?" I stood up and unlocked the door. "I think I'm good. Thanks for helping me out." She gave me another tight hug. "Of course. See you later." she replied. I washed my face with some water to calm down the redness and puffiness of my eyes. I walked through the hall with my legs shaking weakly. I saw Laurie, walking with a huge smile on her face. I felt my heart race again and my cuts felt like they were on fire. I just kept walking. I walked into Mr. Carlton's class to get my bag. He has plan this period anyway. I picked up my bag and tried rushing out of the room but he stopped me.

"You're not getting away this easily. Sit." I sighed and sat in front of his desk. I let out another tear. "Listen to me. What Laurie did was absolutely wrong. She had no right to blurt out your private business. And I'm not trying to interfere with your private life but if you don't mind me asking, why did you do that to yourself?" Here we go again. I can never escape that question. But, he's a teacher and he won't let me leave until I tell him so I might as well get it out of my system.

"My dad is a cop. He's supposed to be protecting the city and his family. Everyday, he comes home drunk. Vodka, Jack Daniels, you name it, he drinks it. When he drinks, he gets.... abusive. Not toward me, but toward my mother. He beats her, and when I say 'beats her', I mean really beats her. Punches her, kicks her, slaps her; she's like his punching bag. Last night, he left a bruise on her stomach. She barely slept all night because of the pain. I didn't want her to go through it alone so I cut myself so she wouldn't be the only one in pain. I know it sounds like a stupid reason but it's the truth."

He stared at me as he tried understanding my story. I got a weird feeling in my chest. I felt like all the pressure inside of my body had disappeared. I felt relieved.

He finally looked me straight in the eyes and said, "It's not a stupid reason. You love your mom alot and you don't like seeing her in pain, especially when it's caused by your dad. But, hurting yourself because of it makes no sense. It doesn't make your mom feel better, it doesn't make your dad stop beating her, and it doesn't make you feel good either. Have you talked to anyone about this?" I shook my head. "I've only told you, and my two best friends, Hayley and James." He nodded and wrote me a pass to my next class. "If I were you, I'd see a counselor about this." I rolled my eyes and took the pass.

I walked downstairs to the first floor of the building. I found a janitor's closet and walked in. It was small, a little cramped. It had about three shelves filled with rolls of paper towels, toilet paper, various cleaning supplies, and washcloths. I sat down along with my bag in silence. I let out a heavy breath. I can't see a counselor. Counseling is for crazy people. If I go to a counselor and tell them what's going on, they're going to baker act me, arrest my dad, and send me to a foster home. It sounds like hell. My mom will be lonely and I'll be with some other family that barely cares for me. The only good thing I get out of it is my dad will rot in jail. That day will be the best day of my life. I heard a knock on the door and I panicked. The door unlocked and stand there was the janitor. "Sorry. I'm guessing you need this space." He smiled and nodded as I picked up my bag. I gave him a small smile and walked away.

I looked at the time and the bell was about to ring for lunch. I started walking toward the cafeteria when the bell rang and the sidewalks and hallways flooded with students. I got a slice of pizza and a coke and walked toward my tree. Sitting there, as usual, was James.

"Hey, where's your lunch?" He looked at me as I sat in the grass. "Eh. Not hungry. Feeling a little better?" I nodded as I took a bite of pizza and opened up my coke. "Well, I was until Laurie decided to go 'evil bitch' on me during English. Opened up her big mouth about the cuts. Instead of talking shit about what's not her business, she could make her big mouth useful and stick to sucking-" "Whoa, I get it. You're angry," He giggled at the thought of the possible ending to that sentence. "But, trashing her behind her back doesn't make you any better, no offense." I finished up my pizza and chased it with another sip of coke. "None taken. But, I'm just getting out my feelings to you, not telling the whole school. Technically, it doesn't count. But, I just wish she would stop trying to destroy my life. It's shitty enough without her. Besides, I had talk to Mr. Carlton about it. He thinks I should see a counselor." James nodded. "I think that's a good idea. You can talk to the counselor about everything; your parents, the cuts, and Laurie. Maybe they can help you with your coping and expression skills." I rolled my eyes. "Ugh, you sorta sound like Mr. Carlton." He smirked. "Maybe because he's right. Seriously, think about it. As much as I love you, I can't be your personal therapist forever." I threw my trash away and we laid down in the grass together. His hand was next to mine and I was praying that he would go and grab it.

I finally looked at him and said, "Thank you." He looked at me, confused. "For what?" "For dealing with me and my shit for so long. I don't think anyone has stuck with me by my side all these years other than you." He smiled. "You're welcome. And that's what best friends do. They stick around when your whole world crashes and burns around you. That's why I'm here for you. That's why you're there for me." "But, your world never even trails off track, let alone crash and burn." He looked up to the sky and let out a sigh. "That's how it might seem on the outside. But, trust me. It's not all butterflies and rainbows in my house." We sat up and grabbed our things. The bell rang and he walked away. Now, I wonder what really goes on behind James's supposed 'perfect' life.