Amore|
I felt , relieved . More so suprised . I could breathe now & I damn sure wasn't worried about Chresanto . It's been at least a month since I've seen Chresanto & since I've let him see Bailey . I let Destiny watch Bailey while I stayed home . Yes , I was still upset & broken , but I know I can't bring myself down because of what he did . Bailey was getting big & it's be wrong if I didn't let him see her . (305) Missed Calls from : Chress🔒💍❤️
(45) New Voicemails . Well, I need to change that contact name , soon and quick . I haven't answered his calls because I don't want to hear his voice . I don't think we could ever be the same again . How can you propose to me , promise me the world then , cheat on me ? I'll remove myself . When I seen him with her , I was broken ... I'll admit that . It was like a big fuck you . Fuck you Amore , I don't give a fuck .
*Iphone ringtone goes on *
And it was Chresanto calling as usual ..
I answered , but didn't say anything . I just took a big breath and paced walking back and forth . " Amore ... Amore ? " He sounded surprised , and relieved . "Amore ... Please let mme see you. I miss you , I miss Bailey , Amore... Amore please . "
" I love you ..."
And that was it , I was damn near drowning in tears . Sobbing loud as hell , I just couldn't take it . "I'm coming to see you , I can't take it . " After that he hung up . I stood up , unlocked the door , turned my speaker on , put my back against the wall and slid down silently . I just cried ... I couldn't stop crying . Chresanto burst through the door and got on his knees next to me . He grabbed me and held me tight . He didn't hesitate to let me go . He just held me ... The way I wanted to be held .
After a while we had a full conversation about everything . At first he was just blabbing his mouth off about how much he missed Bailey & I . Then he brought up the whole situation . I didn't cry . I just told him what I felt and how I was dealing with it . He was shocked to hear that I cut myself . He said sorry over and over and looked sad . I went to the bathroom to fix
myself up & that's when he came in behind me . "Is she here ? " He asked
"Who? "
"Bailey ." He replied .
"Oh , no she's with Destiny . They should be back tomorrow . "
He put his hands in his pockets and looked at me , "You know I been feeling like shit right ? "
I jumped on the bathroom counter & looked him in his eyes , hands on his chest , replying ," I know ... But you have to forgive and forget ... That's what my mom taught me . "
"So , I forgive you Chres. & I'll admit I do miss you . " He took that as a 'We're getting back together '. & kissed me . I did kiss back , as stupid as I was . But then reality hit , and I thought. Do you really want to go through this all over again ?
I wasn't .
I pushed him back & he looked confused . I opened my mouth , " I can't, Chres . Not again . "
"Amore , I'm sorry , I promise it won't happen again . "
"Isn't that what you said last time ? Yeah , and look at us now ... Look , you can come home . But we are NOT together . You can be home & stay with Bailey as much as you want . But us ? We're not getting anywhere . The wedding is still off . I can't put myself through the same bullshit over and over again . I deserve better . I'm not saying I'm moving on but you need to understand the pain I felt . I don't think you get that yet , but you will soon . I'm not gonna pack your bags , Im not going to wear that wedding ring . As much as I want you back & As much as I miss you . I'm not gonna put myself in that situation again . " He was speechless , but then nodded . "I love you , don't forget that . We just need time , to breathe . ".
"So we can still watch Empire & lay under the covers ? " He smiled , " Yes , Chres . But don't get too touchy touchy , we not together . Okay ? "
"Okay. " He nodded
