The Illusion of CTRL

Snap Back To Reality

Uzi stepped into the next memory feeling...conflicted. That was nothing new in her journey through the trials and tribulations of Serial Designation Nathan, but this was a different and, she admitted, altogether more petty type of "conflicted".

She had just come out of the memory of their first meeting, and seeing it from N's perspective was a reality check she wasn't ready for. They never really talked about the night they met, or any of Uzi's clandestine trips into the city before that. Because what was there to talk about, really? As it turned out, there was quite a bit.

Like the fact that N hadn't just stumbled upon her while looking for V. He'd clocked her almost as soon as she'd entered the city proper, and from his mumbled "That one again?", it wasn't the first time. All her preparations and precautions, all the skulking and waiting, all the terror she didn't let herself think about; it was all essentially pointless. She probably would've been better off just calling him out in the middle of the street and asking if she could poke around for a couple hours.

And then there was how he had very nearly botched the rescue because he found himself subconsciously falling into the old habit of picking out the best bodies to present to V.

But they could talk about that later. For now, Uzi was in the home stretch and looking forward to being back in the real world.

She surveyed her surroundings and blinked when she realized she was inside the landing pod. A rarity, since N do NOT like the landing pod.

"Oh, great," Uzi grunted. "What fresh hell is this?"

"I think we're done with those for today," N's voice answered as the center chair in front of the control unit swiveled around to reveal the drone himself. "I hope."

"...N?"

"Yeah, it's me," N said as he stood up and gestured to himself. "All of me."

It took Uzi a couple seconds to realize what was going on when he just stood there and said nothing else. He was submitting himself for evaluation, and by the look on his face he fully expected to be found lacking.

She hoped that look changed when she launched herself at him for a fierce hug.

"I'm here for all of you," Uzi spoke into his chest, meaning every word.

"...I'm sorry I'm not as cool as you thought I was."

"You're so much cooler."

"...I'm more of a failure than I ever thought."

"You're a survivor, and you never stopped trying even when the deck was clearly stacked against you."

"...I couldn't save them. Any of them."

"You saved US. You saved ME. You used me as bait, but you saved me."

That one got a chuckle out of N and his arms finally came up to return the hug.

"I've always been sorry about that. It's why I had to heal you. You got hurt because of me. You could've died because of me. I couldn't just walk away from that."

"Pff, that bitch was no match for my plot armor," Uzi scoffed, resisting the urge to lean back and see if N felt some kind of way about her pet name for V. "But, I'm glad you've picked up the pace since then."

N laughed again and gave her a gentle squeeze.

"Be that as it may, I'm still sorry. For that, and...what you had to see."

"I knew what I signed up for then, and nothing has changed now," this time Uzi did lean back to look N right in the eyes. "You've always had the most scuffed lore of anyone I've ever even heard of, and it never stopped me from being your friend. I'm still here, N, and I'm not going anywhere."