Forbidden

We Be All Night

Nothing seemed to make sense. How can he say that? How can Athendora hate me so much? I'm like a confused bee trying to get nectar from the sun. I feel no wisp of relief, as my mind drifts further into the abyss of sorrow. Hopelessly I ponder these afflictions, only reaffirming the hell I now wander. Any hope for relief is thwarted by the agony and sadness that haunts me.

I went to the bathroom and washed up, my phone started ringing. Who could be calling me at this time? This early in the morning. Hmm private number. Weird who could that be?

"Hello?" I picked my phone up

"Bella its me, Athendora..." She said, oh great what does she want now?

"Hi, is something wrong?" I asked her, confused as to why shes calling me this early in the morning after yesterdays wonderful dinner

"No I wanted to clarify something." She paused

"Which is?" I questioned

"I really don't care how much Edward says that he loves you, he's said it plenty of times in the past with his other girlfriends. I'm sure he told you about them. I don't want you or need you in my family. Make that clear." She said sharply

"Let me make one thing clear, I never asked for your opinion about anything. I don't care what you think. You're opinion doesn't mean shit to me." I told her out of anger my body began to tremble, and my arms became very numb.

"Oh well you should, because Edward loves his mom more than anything in this world. And if she doesn't want you, he'll never be with you. He will leave you and dump you as well. " She said as she closed the phone in my face

It felt as if something had reached in, tore my heart from my chest, threw it on the ground stepped on it then put it back. The pain was so deep, so agonizing, so intense, My heart was mangled beyond recognition, My mind numb, racing in circles, unable to make sense of what was happening...was this real...it couldn't be real, wake up, wake up... I was not sure I could use my heart again. I was not sure it could heal. I was not sure I could live...I was awake, living, but slowly, emotionally and mentally dying... 

The phone call had left me speechless, heart hammering painfully in my chest as my breathing went from quick to next to nothing at all. In my state of numbness, the phone had dropped from my hand and clattered to the ground, and the next thing I knew, I was running. Feet pounding against the pavement, only one thought swarmed through my mind: How did this happen?

It's like, "GRR!!!", "DAMMIT!".

Its early in the morning and the sky is grey and dark with huge cloud, soon there where flashes of light in the sky which appears to be lightning, it followed by thunder and then poured down heavily. The smell of incoming rain was heavy in the air as was the electricity, the expectation of the coming storm. A crash of thunder sent my heart pounding. The sky continued to flash as I sat waiting expecting the rain to finally ascend upon us.

I bit back on the need to want to curl up on the sidewalk and scream out my inner feelings, let the world hear my voice as I called out her name, but I didn't. Instead, I settled on running faster, panting as my eyes burned slowly, whether it be from holding my tears back, or the wind licking at them, I was unsure. The settling feeling of depression ranked through my mind again as I took an immediate right through the town, seeing the hospital come into view. I was unsure if she would survive now, and that's what frightened me.

Just a few more steps, I told myself, grinding my teeth together as I ran swiftly. Rage inflamed through my body like a fire licking gasoline, quickly spreading through to create destruction. A fire in the darkness growing brighter and stronger. I bit back the sadness that was swimming through my veins. I was unclenching and clenching my fist too many times, my nails digging into my palms.